u/Livid-Walk-5885

I am very fortunate to have had a successful cycle last year and got in to a great school that I am overall very happy with, but I am just feeling so sad to be so far from home.

It’s finally hitting me that in a month, I’ll be nearly a thousand miles from home and I’ll no longer be in my childhood home that I’ve always been in. I’m gonna miss my family so, so much, and I’m just starting to mourn my childhood and all the time we’ve spent together because I know that the time where my family is all under the same roof is close to coming to an end. This gap year I spent at home with them was also so, so nice and it made me appreciate them even more.

The school is out of state and probably a 3 hour flight/12 hour drive, and I know I’m gonna be so so homesick. I’m already imagining having a hard time adjusting and don’t think I’ll be doing well the first few months of school lol so I’m not excited for that either. My parents are also older so I am feeling guilt surrounding leaving them, especially since I did get into an IS school, but they are also very excited for me and wouldn’t even let me choose my IS option lol.

I’m trying to focus on the positives, like how the school I’m going to has a better curriculum than my IS option, more resources, higher ranked and will hopefully help me match close to family later. I can do my best to fly home during breaks as well, so I’ll at least see them a few times a year which I guess is similar to undergrad, which I eventually adjusted to.

Just looking to get some reassurance that I’ll be okay and if anyone can relate :(

Made a sankey post before but it didn't have school names and deleted it soon after. Am a little bored before school starts so decided to post again in the hopes it helps someone who felt similar as I did when the cycle first began!

I went into the cycle super stressed about the BBB and decided to apply to a lot of T20s in the hopes of getting good financial aid. I definitely was not actually expecting any success from T20s so I was surprised beyond my wildest expectations. While I do not think that my hours are considered super low (don't wanna scare anyone with similar hours), I did not think they were anywhere near the crazy amount of hours that some applicants have.

Stats: 4.0/522, FAP recipient

ECs:

• 400 clinical hours at the time of application (+800 projected during gap year)
• 400 hours non clinical employment 
• 300 nonclinical volunteer hours 
• 150 leadership
• 600 research (+200 projected during gap year) 2 publications, 1 poster presentation, 1 abstract

Other notes:

• Interviews: I am quite shy and definitely a bit socially anxious, so was terrified about interviews. I practiced interviews a ton but was definitely very nervous and not the most eloquent during the majority of them. However, I do think I was able to come across as kind and thoughtful despite my nerves. This might be an unpopular opinion, but, as someone easily nervous in these kinds of situations, honestly I feel like interviewers appreciate the genuineness and the variation in personality sometimes rather than only seeing the typical super confident, charismatic and talkative applicant. Obviously not meant to be a dig at anyone extroverted or who falls into this category, just meant for reassurance for those introverted and quiet like me.
• One of my majors was a semi-unique computational/technology major. A few of my research projects and other ECs related to the major so I think that helped to make my narrative a bit more unique.

https://preview.redd.it/4ih9viuakj8h1.png?width=2320&format=png&auto=webp&s=4324a5ff77479ffa7db13f15280f2de661752f76

I was accepted off the waitlist to my dream school in May and while I am definitely extremely, extremely grateful for the opportunity and know it will be immensely helpful for my future career, I can’t help but feel sad and terrified at the thought of being so far from home.

The school will be a roughly 12 hours drive/3 hour flight from home. I lived very close to home throughout undergrad and have always had my support system very close by. Living at home this past year during my gap year only made me appreciate my family even more, which makes the thought of leaving all the more sad. A part of me knows that these last few months before leaving might be the last time ever where my family is all living under the same roof (my sibling might move out before I finish school as well). It just feels bittersweet knowing that after this, being together as a family in the physical proximity sense will be harder :(

I’m trying to look at the bright sides to distract myself from the fear. For one, I like the curriculum and general opportunities that the school I will be attending has to offer a lot more than the in-state school I was originally planning on attending. I also know that it will be a good opportunity for me to grow more independent and spread my wings, as I always have been somewhat reliant on my family. Not having to live at home with family (as I would have if I attended my in-state school) also means that it might be easier to socialize more.

Didn’t mean to vent so much on here lol and I know it’s about time I leave this subreddit but I’ve already shared these thoughts to all my friends/family irl and just needed another space to air these thoughts out again. Is anyone else in a similar situation and how are you guys coping?

I’ve already made a post like this before rip but back then I was planning on attending an in state school close to my support system. Now I will be attending an OOS, far from home school I got off the waitlist for and am so so afraid of not being able to make friends and the fear is growing everyday.

I never thought in my wildest dreams that I would be accepted to a school like this, but I am also well aware of the student demographics typically attending schools like the one I will be attending. After doing some looking around in the admitted student group chats, the majority attended ivy or T20 undergrads whereas I just attended my state school. I know this doesn’t really matter, but the stereotype for schools like this (and I know largely med students in general) is already that the students are all privileged and from affluent backgrounds, and I’m afraid of not being able to relate to anyone at all. I had a low income childhood and broken family who, despite our struggles, I love very much, and while I know it doesn’t define me as a person, I am afraid of people looking down on me for it.

I’m also naturally a bit more reserved and socially anxious and have always had a harder time making friends compared to other people. I made a good amount of close friends during undergrad, but that was a larger setting and easier to find people I meshed well with since there were so many students. The class size at my med school is quite small (~100) and I’ve heard so many people say that med school is like high school all over again, and to say the least, I did not have the easiest time making friends in high school. I also don’t particularly drink or party (not because I look down on it or anything like that, but it’s partially due to anxiety and partially due to experiences with family members with alcoholism lol) and I’m worried about not fitting in because of this too.

I’ve already had a few of my friends warn against how students at these types of schools can be more toxic than usual and to not to mention my background a whole lot if I want to try to fit in. It also doesn’t help that I didn’t go to second look due to being on the waitlist and will know literally 0 people there.

Do any lurking med students or anyone else have any advice to offer? I am fine with not making super super friendships that will for life during school, but I’d also rather not go through medical school completly alone, especially in a brand new city. I’d be satisfied with making just a few friends I can study and occasionally hang out with, but at this point I’m not even sure I’d be able to do that.

I might just be overthinking everything and spiraling myself for no reason, but really any advice or words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated!