u/Local-Conference-476

I am in my 30s, and my entire life I have not meshed well with others. I understand that a lot of it comes down to social skills and how much time/effort you want to put in, but it just seems like no matter what I do I am not a well-liked person.

I don't know if it's just in my head or not, but I frequently feel as though people form "cliques" around me and invite each other to things, but then I am not considered at all. (Case in point, I recently cut off some "friends" when they told me to my face that they invited me out (and I don't even go out!!) because one of their other friends couldn't make it and they needed a certain head count for free drinks.)

There were two new people added to our small team, and they have gotten along with everyone and have already formed bonds by hanging out after work, etc, but no one has reached out to me. I have reached out to them a couple of times, friendly and outgoing (unheard of for me but I told my therapist I would make efforts), and... Nothing. Maybe one or two sentences, but nothing to help me keep the conversation going.

I am not sure if this is because my reputation precedes me, but I do go out of my way to be friendly. I ask people about themselves, I try to give grace and patience when I can, etc, but it just feels like no matter what I do, I am the odd one out.

I just want to know if this is a common experience with you all, or if I'm an unfortunately unique case.

(Gosh, I sound like such a weenie. I am not stressing about this nearly as much as my words say I am! I'm just incredibly confused.)

I have never heard of the test until a week ago, and then I got INTJ. I read the typical article that comes with the “diagnosis” and was curious to read more. I just read the article in the side bar. Wow.

I feel so seen right now.

It’s a weird feeling. It’s weird that so many of you also have this blessing and curse.

Pleased to meet you all :)