I just have a question. Through all of my cheating and infidelity, i managed to ruin a lot of important dates for my BP. I'm just curious if there's a way to reclaim those dates and make them special again, or am I doomed to spend them regretting what I did?
So, I posted here the other day asking for insight into my situation and got some really thoughtful responses. I eventually panicked and ended up deleting the post because I realized my partner uses Reddit too, and I wanted to make sure they were okay with me talking about our relationship online before posting anything else.
For context: a couple of years ago, I cheated on my partner multiple times with multiple people over the course of a few years. The biggest mistake wasn't just the cheating itself—it was continuing to let things come out piece by piece instead of being completely honest from the beginning. Every new discovery reopened the wounds, and I now understand why.
Recently, the last undisclosed part of my infidelity came to light. It led to a lot of anger, hurt, and things being said. We're now separated and taking space to figure out what we each want.
I'm not looking for reassurance that everything will work out, and I know there are no shortcuts to rebuilding trust.
What I'm hoping to hear is from people who have been through something similar—either as the person who cheated or the person who was betrayed.
Besides giving them space, respecting their boundaries, and consistently changing my behavior over time, is there anything else I can do to show that I'm genuinely committed to repairing the damage? How do you demonstrate that there won't be another "last thing" to discover?
I'm open to honest feedback, even if it's difficult to hear.