Custody
I have a son who has recently turned 15; this past August (he was 14) he decided he was going to start sneaking around trying to stay the night at his girlfriends and sneaking out of my house. His father knew about these things and did not tell me. When my son was confronted he packed his bags and took off to his dads. Very little communication followed for a few weeks and I figured when school was starting he would be back; but instead I got court papers for custody and of course child support. My sons law guardian has always been a conflict of interest as she knew my ex personally before she was ever appointed (have notified the court multiple times). My son told the guardian he wanted more time with his dad (1:1 household vs family of 5 at my house) and that we argue at my house. The court did not take any history or facts into consideration, just the words of a 14 year old trying to get his way. The court was fine with it and told me oh well the 14 year old can choose whether he sees me or not so I didn’t even get visitation. My ex filed for support and then did not turn any documentation that the court requested….resulting in 3 court appearances spanning over 6 months all because he didn’t want to turn in his finances while asking me for money. That court awarded my ex child support even though I have been a stay at home mom for going on 3 years with my two younger children. They told me my wife couldn’t be responsible for my son but she pays all the bills and I don’t work so they made up a fake salary in order for me to pay support all because I used to work as a nurse.
My ex and I have a very long history. We have a large age difference of 18 years…I was 19 when I got pregnant for our son. The three years I was with his father I endured physical, emotional, financial and mental abuse. I’ve had restraining orders/orders of protection; CPS had been involved many times and even told me if I don’t leave they would take my son from me. When I left my son was 3 years old and we lived in a domestic violence shelter until I could get my own place. Shortly after that I was awarded physical and legal custody of my son’s older sister; my exes oldest child whom was a teenager at the time. The 12 years we’ve been back and forth in court should matter I would think? I can’t afford a lawyer so I’m lost on what to do next? My son is a lost child due to the abuse he’s witnessed and the lies his father has fed him. My son keeps asking me to just tell him all the truth about his father so he can figure out why he’s so torn but I don’t want to do that as I would never want to ruin their relationship. My son has witnessed his father’s abusive parts with other women as well as towards himself. Looking for any help/advice.