I called my friend selfish cause he was asking me to lend money that he never returns back. AITK?
I know my friend from school days, thats like 25 years now. We have been very tight, stood by each other through many things. Over the years he has helped me few times with some problems, like one time I got bullied when I joined the Engineering college and in a scuffle 3 guys beat me, me friend got to know about that and 2 days later he took 10 guys and beat the living shit out of those guys, this was in 2008. Many a times he had come to airport to pick me up at 3AM and drop me at odd hours. Sometimes when I wasn't in the city he would visit my home to check on my parents. Likewise I have stood for him at each time, when his mom and later his dad passed away, I was the first one to reach his home and take care of everything while he was mourning. I helped him when he was down with covid and took all risks at that time to get oxygen cylinder for him.
Over the years I have lent him so much money that I can't even remember. 2 years ago, I bought a new bike and wasn't using my old bike anymore so he asked to borrow it for few days but haven't returned it yet. Since I wasn't going to use my old bike anymore, I never asked him back and he hasn't given a single penny for that either. Its gotten to the point that my parents and wife hate that aspect of him.
So 2 days ago his brother met with an accident and was in the hospital. My friend called me and asked for 40k, saying that his brother doesn't have insurance. I didn't think about it and sent 20K immediately. But since then he has been calling me and asking me to send the rest 20K. He promises to return the 40K in few days but based on his history I know he will not. I'm fine with loosing that 40K but my wife is totally against it and we have few financial commitments too. Its not like my friend doesn't have money, he has saved up to buy a car in the first week of June. My wife's argument is why does he get to save money to buy a car whereas we get to fund their medical expenses. Which is a fair point.
So my friend kept calling me despite me saying that I don't have money. At one point I also got frustrated and asked him that he could break his savings for the car as his brothers treatment is more important than the car and its not like 20K is going to set him back by many months. This kind of got escalated in a minor disappointment from his side and he started saying that I'm a selfish person to which I rebutted saying he shouldn't be the one talking about it. He cut the call and then sent a long voice message saying that if it weren't for him I would have been bullied all through the college and would have lead a miserable life. Don't know but that stuck a nerve and I just responded saying thanks for that. He then sent another voice message saying that I'm a thankless person. I also got frustrated and sent a voice message saying how much of a selfish person he has been for never considering things from my point of view and always borrowed money and never returned back. I know I shouldn't have but in a moment of frustration it got out. He said he never wants to talk to me ever. Now he isn't picking my calls since then. And since he is my only close friend I couldn't get it out of my head either. AITK for behaving that way?