u/Loud-Mans-Lover

Whoopsie.

Am now ice cold, stomach cramping, throwing up, dizzy and passing tons of bile out the other end as well. Ripped open a fissure too from the strain, so extra hooray.

Yay me.

I swear, it's almost impossible for me to know what's going to make me sick like this. I kept a food diary, checked everything, and I can pinpoint some things but others are... stupid. Skin off a home cooked chicken that is baked dry? Nope. But fried chicken? Fine. Wheat bread? Hell, no. But white's okay?

I've had my gallbladder out so any fat content is tricky, but like I said, certain foods that are 100% greasy are actually okay. It's maddening.

I just don't want to eat anymore. It's too much of a hassle. I'm morbidly obese from multiple factors, and it's not helping any of my ailments. So why not (I know why not, yeah). But sometimes I think it'd be easier to just... quit and go liquids and puree. I don't have the strength to cook anyway. Or shop. Or anything, most days.

Show up half an hour early, the receptionists all wave me in, awesome.

Proceed to sit and wait 40 minutes.

When I get up to check, I was supposed to be at a different location? Even though *no one told me*? And yes, no one told me - I checked when we got home and the card says this location, not a different one. It's literally *checked* by *hand*.

So now, the appt where I was going to know if I need outpatient or major surgery, possibly cancer, you know, no biggie... I have to wait A MONTH for a new apot because the doctor is out until then.

I am not okay. I'm in pain from this shit as well as other things, and I can't, I don't have the patience/mental fortitude to *wait*. I could barely wait a couple weeks, now I need to wait a month?!

Guess the hysterectomy is getting scheduled first. Oh well. Guess if that one issue, the huge stone, drops, I'll just have to go to the ER... again.

And yeah, I checked in with dr on my app, asking him if he could at least tell me what the problems were there before we met up again. I'm just so angry and upset. I want evetything scheduled and ready to go already

I'm currently staring in the face of two major surgeries, maybe more, and the healing for them is fraught with bullshit pain and the usual "so after the surgery you won't have *this*, but now you'll probably always have these your whole life" instead...

But today, a severely painful HS cyst that was in the most extremely painful place they can grow on my woman's person (lol), drained. It's deflated; hopefully I caught the infection overflow so it won't make me sicker, but even if it does, even if it grows back (as they frequently do) that one source of pain is gone *now*.

I damn near cried. The stress of more surgeries and the pain leading up to them, my usual pains, everything. I can celebrate this one win today. I'm gonna go get me some extra lil bit of juice in my water, lol

Woohoo

EDIT: oh no I spoke too soon ;_; I've got more kidney stones and one is too large to pass

Went in for a kidney scan due to blood in my wee, kidney stones and infections popping up a lot (plus a mass was detected).

Turns out it's two masses, possibly just blood cysts, but I've got a flipping fibroid dangling out of my uterus.

I had surgery to remove two polyps (doctor was actually showing the one off to everyone it was so big lol) a couple years ago, but the bleeding never got truly better. My last few periods were so heavy... I absolutely destroyed multiple rugs, pants and underwear alike. Yeah, they cleaned up. But I bled so much I got even more tired than usual. And I'm already bleeding from the cyst and HS tracts I also suffer from.

GYN told me I likely have to have my bits removed now. Sure, I guess, but I'm *going to be 50 this June*. It's almost all over FFS. Why couldn't my body just finish up without more pinata filler growing inside of me?

Something's wrong with how my body is digesting food, too, but we're going to go with seeing the GYN again to discuss stuff first. I swear I get one thing looked at or started to get taken care of and three more pop up. Ugh.

I had a hortible time with recovery from the polyp removal too, weirdly it was one of my worst surgeries even though I had no hospital stay. I'm not looking forward to anything involving this scenario!