u/LoveLettersToNoOne

How the fuck are people getting into four bar games without being host? The other day I joined a game and I looked at my connection and it showed four bars. Once I joined the game I dropped to two bars. I was doing okay for a while, I just ended up leaving to find a better connection. I see YouTubers posting vids with four bar connection all the time. How the fuck? Am I just supposed to be leaving games until I see four bars? I DID THAT, then I somehow I plummeted to two bars. I stayed in games where I had three and the other team had three, went about as equal. But god damn like I said I see these YouTubers going into lobbies with four bar connections all the time. My internet connection isn’t fucking bad, any other game I do just fine with reaction time. Lately it feels like I lose every gun fight even when on my screen I shot first

Like how a sea otter finds a special rock, I’d put you in my pocket.

Warm enough to cup your thoughts, tough enough to listen to the bad.
Yet gentle enough to still find your ticklish spots.

The sun‘s rays wrap their arms around us as we float quietly.

When sea otters fall asleep, their fingers interlock. Hand in hand, so as not to drift away from one another.

Caressing your fingertips,
the scent of your wrist.
Watching your eyes open in the morning: your irises could coax a field of sunflowers into bloom.

Sometimes we close our eyes in spring, and awaken in winter.

I couldn’t kiss you with my gaze anymore.
I’ve gone noseblind.
I keep the empty space like a widow.

Winter’s bite left me trapped in my footsteps where we once stood.

The cold ate through the pockets thickness.
Even with the right care, your thoughts kept pouring out.

If only I’d known that there was a hole at the bottom.

“Shhhh.”
I whisper, as my thumb caresses behind your ear.
The night is still.
We can hear cars splashing by as we sit in the kitchen.

Like sifting my fingers through sand—
I play with your hair. My other palm on your cheek.
Rocking back and forth slowly.

A flood of memories washes over me.

Sharing my bacon with you in the morning.
Walking side by side, no words needed between us.
Racing in a field, inhaling the disturbed grass as we lay down.
Play fights.
The adoration you always had in your eyes.

I can see they’re tired.

“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, mm mmm mm happy, mm skies are grey.
please don’t…”

The weather has picked up outside, raindrops desperately trying to hold on as they roll down the window.

You’ve been strong and brave, the best you could’ve ever been.

A fog envelops us, wrapping its arms around.
We share each other‘s gaze one last time.

“It’s okay—
One day I’ll open the door again,
and you’ll be waiting.

Until we meet again.”

I’ve witnessed her eyes transform throughout the year of changing light.

Hazelnut, as they bloom in the early spring. Tenderly glimmering like dew in the sun’s early rays. Wrapping me in their warmth.

Almost golden, where the sun ignites her irises. Her lashes flutter and glitter in the sunshine. For a moment, she could bring the ocean to a standstill.

Amber,
flecked with brown, red and yellow of fallen leaves.
I could spend my entire lifetime watching these leaves fall into her lap. Holding them in her hand, mesmerized by each crumple.
the roughness at every end.

The light brown that contrasts against the snow.
If only she could see through my eyes—
how her smile reminds me of snowflakes dancing away under a street lamp in the quiet midnight.

Her eyes are so sweet,
like cinnamon sugar.

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If you glanced my way in a crowded room, I’d feel my cheeks flush.
If you gave me your smile, I wouldn’t know what to do with my hands.
If I walked up and asked for your hand, would you grant me this dance?

You said yes, but I still felt anxious,
your hands were sweaty too.
Your eyes were as sweet as cinnamon sugar, something unobtainable I’d like to hold.
Dilated.

If you interlocked your fingers with mine,
I’d pull you closer.
If you wrapped your arms around my neck,
I’d press my lips against yours.

If you gave me your dreams, I’d hang the moon in your window.
If you let me cup your thoughts, I’d give you my heart.

If you didn’t give me a reason for your silence,
I’d still sit with you.
If you didn’t trust me enough to share your experiences—I’d still trace your thumb.
If things are difficult between us, I’d still peel the strings off your oranges.

If your knees grew weak, I’d still take you to see the ocean.
The seagulls wailing above, the waves kissing the sand, basking in the suns rays.

If we didn’t get to say goodbye, I’d still close my eyes beside yours.

”Shhhh”
I whisper, as my thumb caresses behind your ear.
The night is still, we can hear cars splashing by as we sit in the kitchen.

Like sifting my fingers through sand—
I play with your hair. My other palm on your cheek.
Rocking back and forth slowly.

A flood of flash memories washes over me.

Sharing my bacon with you in the morning.
Walking side by side, no words needed between us.
Racing in a field until we found a nice spot to lay on, the way I inhaled the disturbed grass.
Play fights.
The adoration you always had in your eyes.

I can see they’re tired.

I find myself humming to the tune “You Are My Sunshine” with you in my arms.
You’ve been strong and brave, the best you could’ve ever been.

A fog envelops us, wrapping its arms around.
We share each other‘s gaze one last time.

“It’s okay”—
as the fog wrap tighter to collect.

Until we meet again.

I’d rip the laugh from her throat and keep it in a jar.
To shake like a snow globe, hearing the echo her dancing within.

I’d pry the scent of her scent from her wrist and embed it into a scarf, to wear even in the summer.

I’d tear my eyes from my skull and replace hers with mine, so she could see the way I saw her.

Fragile—like holding a lit match,
burning brightly, but bound to fade.
Fingertips singed.

I need to let me let you go.

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Like how a sea otter finds a special rock, I’d put you in my pocket.

Warm enough to cup your thoughts, tough enough to listen to the bad, yet gentle enough to still find your ticklish spots.

The sun’s rays wrap their arms around us as we float quietly.

When sea otters fall asleep, their fingers interlock. Hand in hand, so as not to drift away from one another.

Caressing your fingertips, the scent of your wrist. Watching your eyes open in the morning: your irises could coax a field of sunflowers to bloom.

Sometimes we close our eyes in spring, and awaken in winter.

I couldn’t kiss you with my gaze anymore.
I‘ve gone noseblind.
I keep the empty space like a widow.

Winter‘s bite left me trapped in my footsteps where we once stood.

The cold ate through the pocket‘s thickness.
Even with the right care, your thoughts kept pouring out.

If only I’d known that there was a hole at the bottom.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/v1GlLxJ3MD

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/5e5fwtCg9h

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