u/Low_Syllabub_1781

when I was a trad. It brought out the worst in me. It was this false consciousness that enabled and emphasized my worst tendencies. Idk how to explain but I feel like my body was snatched. Im not eschewing responsibility btw, im just describing the sensation and memory of it all from my current perspective. It was a seven year phase I’m still climbing out of and it affected my decision making for the worst in every area, socially, professionally, financially, health, etc. Damn near ruined my life.

Question: how do I move on? How do I forgive myself? How do I ask the world for forgiveness for who I was? How do I start over? I feel so burdened by what was. And so embarrassed.