Sometimes I just go through stuff and decided to write whatever comes to mind. Here is something. Be honest.
No better Choice
Do whatever makes you feel better. Yeah, sure. What if there is no such thing as making me feel better? Then what am I to do? Yeah, well, maybe, well, maybe you didn't find it yet. Sure, I could choose to rest, sit back, wait; maybe that object of fulfillment, happiness, whatever, will find me eventually, right? I can't say whether it's right or wrong, though sitting with this lack can be comforting for some and destructive for others. I believe that this comfort can also work for some, propelling them into a state of well-being, helping them live in the present so they can be aware of small things and thus find joy in them, leading to a somewhat easy, almost monotonous life, but happy. I'm thinking that this fulfillment only appears later, as time passes. It is slowly constructed, as the appetite comes with eating or something. Coming back, for some, this comfort seems like a conscious state of decay, the will to rot, drying one's potential willingly, it may seem, choosing to do nothing over something, seemingly frustrating and thus not suitable, right? Truly understandable. Moreover, an active life, a constant search, and effort may create some relative safety, as there is no certainty about anything. And of course, it can be rewarding. Maybe someone sees that effort; maybe that merit might be validated; maybe, after creating, after everything invested, there should be credit. Maybe. Maybe it turns out you invested everything in the wrong domain, turns out you've been looking in the wrong direction for the whole time. If everything is possible, why shouldn't this be? And what if it's too late to go back to do it all again? Is it worth it? Maybe. Maybe you'll fail a second time. Would you do it again? Do you still have what it takes to start over? Maybe, maybe not. Can you bear the burden, the pain of folding? So, will you risk everything to potentially achieve greatness, or will you make a choice that's more forgiving but means you have to forget about your potential? There is no shame in choosing any of these lifestyles, or whatever you want to call them. Life ends in the ground, no matter what you choose. The only difference is that one choice raises you to the clouds and beyond, and when it's all over, it just throws you back to where you came from. No questions asked, no matter what you achieved. You are thrown to the ground as hard as possible, and the other choice builds up a more gradual descent. It is more gentle, but it still gets you to the ground. There is no better choice. It is just how you cope with the consequences of your own actions, even if they are enforced.