I hate my girlfriend’s best friend.
Hey Reddit, I’ve never done this before but I need an outside opinion on my situation. I (32m) and my girlfriend (34f) (who we will call Patricia) have been dating for about a year and a half. I can honestly say that this has been the best relationship I’ve ever been in. When there are issues we talk and resolve them. I feel heard and supported for the first time and it’s really great. That is except her best friend who we will call Janna. Janna who’s also in her mid 30’s is the epitome of what I can’t stand in women today. She is a self diagnosed narcissist who says she’s just honest and if people don’t like that than that’s there problem. She jumps from guy to guy and they are all douchebags who openly say they just wanna sleep with her and then she will say to me and my girlfriend “why can’t I find a good man.”The worst part is that she did somehow find a genuine dude and she was cheating on him constantly. It was disgusting. However this is Patricia’s one and only friend, and they have been friends since middle school. Patricia is also a recovering substance abuser and has been a not so great person to other people and Janna has stuck by her through these years. Patrica tries to tell me that Janna is going through a phase since she is divorced and now single for the first time since she was 20. Ok fair enough, I always try to treat Janna with respect and kindness when I see her, but I do not like her at all. Now here’s where the problem is. A few months ago Patricia asked me if they could go on a girls trip to a nearby city. They would share an air bnb together and spend Friday afternoon driving up, Saturday day going to an adult playground thing, and then I was told maybe they would go to a bar. Then they planned on coming home Sunday. I was asked if I could spot some money and I was on board with it as it seemed safe enough. After agreeing we were out with Janna who had a few drinks and approached me and yelled “Hey I’m taking Patricia on this girls trip now give her the fucking money so she can go” I was floored. I already gave my girlfriend the money and here I am getting yelled at for it. I walked away and later spoke to Patricia privately about it to which she said she would talk with Janna and sort it out. No apology was ever made, I was never talked to about the situation. The girls trip comes and goes and nothing out of the ordinary happened. We text and call throughout the weekend and she comes back on Sunday. Now here’s the issue that has occurred. Somewhere in a conversation with Patricia it slipped that they met these 3 guys at the bar they went to. Janna was all about this one guy and she invited them back to the air bnb. They spent the night drinking with these guys and Janna ended up hooking up with one of them. After I press for details and how they ended up coming back, I find out that Janna had already been in contact with these guys and planned this whole thing out and had the audacity to yell at me to pay so my girlfriend could be there. It is still unclear to me if Patricia was aware of this or not, but I am on the side that she did know . I’m absolutely shattered that not only my girlfriend went behind my back and didn’t tell me about this until arriving home, but what’s worse is that Janna (who I’ve been nothing but nice to) planned this trip knowing it would be disrespectful to me and my relationship. Even went so far for me to fund half of it. Patrica sticks up for Janna and says it’s her one friend after her substance abuse days and she doesn’t want to lose this friendship, but to me that’s not a friend. A friend doesn’t put you in those situations. I also asked her would she be ok if one of my friends did the same thing and she said it’s different because I have lots of friends. Help! Please! I don’t know what to do. Is this break up worthy? Should I try another talk with Patricia? Should I just confront Janna myself? Luckily I had to watch one of my friends puppies as they are away on vacation so I’m able sit with my thoughts for the next couple days.