Fiancée taking Step 1 for the 3rd time today. I’m a mess and don’t know where else to put this.
My fiancée is taking Step 1 for the third time today. We get results in about two weeks. I’ve been as supportive as I know how to be through two fails, through the hours and years study grind, through all of it. She’s worked INCREDIBLY hard to even get where she is currently (at an extremely reputable medical school one of the top 50 in the country)
But today a former therapy client of mine (I’m a therapist) texted that she just passed her own Step 2, and something about the timing just wrecked me. I know it’s not about her, I was happy for her, but it kicked up a wave of anxiety and fear for the future I wasn’t expecting.
We’ve been together almost 9 years, and med school has basically been the backbone of that whole time. I don’t regret it, and I know it’s a good life if it works out. But sometimes I feel the weight of how singularly focused she’s had to be, and how much that shapes both of us i.e. the 6 figure debt, the possibility of her taking a year off if this doesn’t go through, the way my own life (currently job hunting while employed, wedding planning) gets pushed to the side while I just have to take it. I feel completely powerless.
Has anyone else been through a third attempt with a partner? How did you get through the wait? And honestly, how do you deal with the mixed feelings that come with loving someone on this path?
Thank you everyone