u/MayBeMarmelade

Warrior “that tree”: Protection (Prot is definitely not for solo leveling and it’s definitely *definitely* not for tanking)

Rogue “that tree”: Assassination (not terrible tbh, just doesn’t have any real use cases)

Druid “that tree”: Balance (hear me out, Balance is not as bad as the memes, but it’s still *absolutely* that tree)

Priest “that tree”: Shadow (the vibe is cool as shit and it especially face-melts at PvP, but it’s still that tree)

Warlock “that tree”: Destruction (not counting raiding. When leveling, compared to your other options, Destro is just a spec that sucks mana and nerfs your health regen for no reason)

Mage “that tree”: Arcane (do I even have to explain?)

Hunter “that tree”: Survival (like Assassination, it’s not exactly *bad*, it just kind of pales next to your other options)

Paladin “that tree”: Retribution (though early on, Retri is arguably the least-bad Paladin tree for solo questing)

Shaman “that tree”: Enhancement (Probably the least “that tree” of the classes, but past a certain level, it’s probably Enhance due to unpredictable burst and threat issues)

“Famous HC WoW Paladin streamer.” Is that a phrase that applies to literally anyone? I mean, I know Xaryu once did a HC Paladin run, but that man tries literally *everything.*

Let’s have a look at some more First World Paladin Problems.

You overpulled with your ass and you had to bubble and run? Oh man. That must have been rough.

You had to *actually* Lay on Hands someone in your party? Dude. That shit must have been wiiiild.

You had to Blessing of Freedom your way out of some roots? Bro. That’s crazy.

Paladin, these fleeting moments of almost-danger are likely the greatest thrills you will ever encounter over your HC journey in Azeroth, the only times you will actually feel something, until you fumble for the correct “I win” button.

That is… if you don’t actually *die.* Despite your kit, it’s theoretically possible. And that would suck majorly. Because then it would be back to Elwynn Forest to “Judgment of [whatever]” + auto-attack your way back through a million mobs.

Paladin, at least when it’s time to dungeon, you can “do it all.” Kind of. But as a dps, you are not only doomed to round out the bottom of the meters, but your rotation is also so terribly *boring*.

As a tank in 5-man content, you’re capable of performing decently, greatly even, but you’ll seldom be trusted, and without any hard taunts available, it’s just kind of *weird.* You should probably type a message for a macro to drop in group chat to give every new PUG a primer on “how Pally tanking works” every fucking time.

As a healer, Paladin, you can actually shine! But being pigeonholed into this role, as you inevitably will should you get into the more punishing HC content, jars a bit with your class fantasy. When you clicked the Holy Hammer at character creation, you probably intended to become a swole, plated Avenger of the Light popping open cans of whoopass on Azeroth’s bad guys. Not a robe-wearing librarian handing out buffs to your teammates and waging “Crusades of the mind.”

But hey, at least there’s this gem of an ability, buried deep within your spellbook: Divine Intervention. Keep this one in your back pocket (or better yet, in a locked safe under your bed at home) should you ever face a situation where you could actually save someone else’s HC life in exchange for your own.

Make no mistake: This has got to be one of the most metal ways of going out available to any class, ever.

There are Paladins out there who counsel never even training Divine Intervention. They are so utterly wrong.

But it’s too bad that this daydream of glorious martyrdom via Divine Intervention will almost certainly elude you, Paladin. You are infinitely more likely to meet your end because you were nodding off in your chair at 2 a.m. Your torpid Judgment + bonk-induced state-of-mind will auto-run you off a cliff, or straight into a wandering elite while all your “I win” buttons are on cooldown. Unlucky you.

But let’s be honest. Part of you probably yearned for the sweet release from actually playing this class.

Here’s the sad situation facing you as a Druid: There is no real reason to bring you to the party.

Need a Tank? A Warrior will put out far more damage, clear runs faster, and hold aggro better. Need a Healer? A Priest has a deeper mana pool, gets control tools like Fade and AOE Fear, and a much better suite of healing/shield spells for snap situations.

Need a Physical dps? You’re an underpowered Rogue that pumps less damage and brings virtually no cc options to the table: no Kick, no Kidney Shot, no Gouge, no Blind, no Distract. You do get a feline-flavored version of Cheap Shot: whoopie! Too bad that opening from stealth is more trouble than it’s worth and only eats into time better spent autoattacking and Shredding.

Need a Spellcaster dps? Uhh, you really want to pit Boomkins against *Mages*, now? Don’t make me actually write that paragraph.

So, yes. You *can* step up to tank. Or heal. Or do middling dps. But most of the time, the main selling point of you is that you’re a warm body that magically turns a group of 4 into a group of 5.

But it’s not all hopeless for you, Druid. While writing this up, I have actually come up with two real, tangible things that your class brings to the table.

First, Mark of the Wild. A nice, all-purpose buff that fattens everyone up. And, lucky you: unlike Paladins, there’s no “which blessing?” gamesmanship involved in distributing your buff. And it lasts 30 entire minutes! So throw that MotW shit on everyone indiscriminately. It’s not really a strong enough buff for parties to specifically seek out — no Windfury worship for you — but MotW is *something.* On a good day, it might even be something *noticeable.*

Second, Innervate. An absolute unit of a spell that you learn at lv. 40 which basically lets you refresh any party member’s entire mana bar: on an instant cast, minimal mana, 6 min-cooldown basis. In overpulls, Innervate could be just the spell that gives your party the extra moxie to pull through. But: here’s the catch, Druid. Never, *ever* cast Innervate on yourself. What, you really think *your* mana bar is the most critical one in the group? Hah, don’t be silly now.

So when the chips are down, go ahead and cast that Innervate on the healer or a Mage. You just may help save the group and make a friend for life. But make no mistake: helping your *ally* clinch the save for the group is really the proudest Druid moment you can ever hope for.

So, have fun shifting and “sure, I can heal”-ing your way to 60, where the real game begins: angling for the 1 spot typically reserved for your class in 40-man raids. Good luck!

Rotation? What rotation? Just press all the buttons in any order until you use up all your mana, mon. Then bonk stuff? I guess.

Gear? Ask 10 Shamans and get 10 different answers. Long story short, you really just need *all the stats.* Make sense? So just wear whatever has the most stats and looks cool. I guess.

But listen up, this part is important. You sure as hell better know exactly what totems to drop and exactly when to drop them to help your allies who are doing the real work shine brighter. And of course, you’ll also need to know exactly when *not* to drop your totems in situations where they might pull and wipe the whole group. That shit actually matters. Yes, your little removable/replaceable wooden effigies that expire after 2 minutes are far more important than you’ll ever be.