u/Minimum-Media-9204

I support Liverpool and Corinthians. I think this is fine because they are in entirely different continents

I would never hate or discriminate someone for who they are. Hate is such a bland term for things you dont like. I have lots of friends who just randomly say stuff like “dont you just hate the jews” or disabled people. You never know what is going on in someones head, or if they are trying to change something that they dont like.

Also, everything is subjective. Not saying that hate is good but i go by the vinland saga philosophy where “no one deserves to be hurt” there are people that i have hate for in the past. But i realised i have no reason to hate. The ancient egyptians believed that once they reached the afterlife they would be asked 2 questions. Has your life brought you joy. And, has your life brought others joy.
There are some truly evil people in this world. But as a wise man once said. The best way to defeat an enemy is to make them your friend.

I was making gingerbread and had my phone on the recipe and out of nowhere my brother swipes up into notifications and i had some GBT notifications and he said out loud “Gay bro teens.” (It was only us 2 in the house) i was visibly cringing. And so i just said it to him. He was fine and the conversation resumed. I was going crazy. I feel horrible now. I wasnt anywhere near ready for this. And now im scared he will say it to someone else or even worse, think of me differently. I am in my bed crying rn. I have had a shit day with me already getting a long term injury at football. I am fucked i have already told a girl at my school. For some reason people think i have a crush on her but i cant come out to them because im scared they will bully me. I am a very loved person at my school with no one having any reason to dislike me. I am scared this will end with me losing my reputation. I just want to be normal.

How do i reject her? I know she still likes me. Its been 3 months so i dont know how to do it

Me (m14) and Z (f13) are in a stalemate at the moment.

For backstory when i was year 8 (grade7) she was year 7 (grade6) and we were in the same class in middle school. I never found any attraction to her but at the time i didn’t think i was gay.

Fast forward to 3 months ago. Z is year 9 (freshman.) and Z leaves for a week to go to futsal nationals. The day that she leaves she texts me, “i have liked you since year 7.” And i didnt know what to do (at the time i still wasnt gay.) i ended up making a whole ass paragraph saying why we shouldnt get together, the main point being depression. Z replied saying she understands and all. But i just dont know what to do now.

2 months ago i realized i was gay. Didnt tell anyone

And now that sums it up. I dont know what to do anymore, i really dont want to break her heart but it will have to happen at some time. I really hate hurting people.

Tldr: girl falls for closet gay guy that doesent want to break her heart.

Im a 14 year old gay person living rurally. Because of this i cant connect with my friends in person apart from school. Another thing is that i have never had someone to love, i feel like this will keep up for the rest of my life, im not sure why, i think im attractive, maybe its just something i cant tell about me (vibe or something) or maybe im just oblivious.

Another thing is that i only feel happy when i am doing sport (mainly soccer or running) my favourite part is when you have such a high heart rate you cant feel your face and everything blurs and you forget everything. But i havent been able to feel this for 4 weeks as i pulled my hamstring in football training. I have nothing to excite me anymore.

Im also having an existential crisis. (Im really not sure but i think it is) sometimes i just ruin my mood when i think about things. Today at school i almost started crying in class just from thinking if anyone will remember me in 15 years from now. I just want to isolate myself and be alone when this happens and it doesnt help that im sleep deprived most of the time getting 7 hours of sleep every night. Sometimes i get through days on the line “some people have it worse” i just dont want to be in public anymore. I have lots of confidence in public spaces, im really good at speeches and keeping my cool, but i dont want to get out of bed, get changed and get ready for another day of dull, grey, boring rainy days. Sometimes i just start crying in my bed listening to The Smiths. This is becoming more often.

Im also touch starved and need human touch. My dog isnt enough anymore. Dont care who it is just want genuine touch.

One last thing is that people close to me dont care for gay people. A piece of me dies everytime someone says something homophobic, and all i can do is play along. I just want to be a normal member of society, i dont want to live a lie my whole life. All i want to be is normal.

Tldr
I am 14 years old. Im conventionally attractive however i never have gotten with someone. I dont know why no one wants me or i just cant tell. I only feel happy these days when im playing soccer. I got my hamstring pulled in training. Ive been away for so long i just want nothing more but to get back. Im also having an existential crisis. Also no one cares about gay people around me, just dont want to be here.