u/Miserable_Treat_5668

Can autistic/ neurodivergent social workers tell me how do you navigate work when your managers remain ignorant about your neurodiverse condition and constantly diagnose you and your performance on the basis of differences you have based on your neurodiversity. I know on papers it is discriminatory to disadvantage someone for being neurodiverse . But my experience, I am sure more people have these experiences , is that neurotypical social workers have very poor understanding of neurodiversity and view it as a deficit at all times and struggle to understand a lot of neurodiverse people are fully functional and don't need their diagnosis, over analysis or support.

I am currently facing a challenge where my manager thinks me being autistic , my communication style can get strange and make clients potentially uncomfortable or on some occasions cause confusion. And they think I might be better off doing desk job to avoid such situations. Despite my autism I still absolutely enjoy working in field, meeting people and supporting them. It is my special interest and I really enjoy it. But because I have autism, my manager still try to come up with opinions on how it might affect my work. its like social workers only exposure to autism or neurodiverse conditions are when they work with vulnerable people who need their support. They find it otherwise hard to accommodate there are neurodiverse people who don't need their social work or support!

It's shocking and alarming for me to see the level of ignorance some social workers with years of experience have and their attitude towards neurodiverse coworkers. I feel so uncomfortable working with such people, when I attempted to move jobs my manager is sabotaging my career move with her random and ignorant views . Though I am challenging it and questioning it, they are still not budging from their views. And using their managerial powers to shut me down.

Can any neurodiverse social worker share their experience of having successfully challenged employers with their discriminatory views on disability?

Have an offer of 46k in London and 47k in reading. Can you all recommend which offer to take up. I currently have 43k in a small beach town, with okayish living cost as a single person. Never lived in London and been a bit isolated without having any multicultural experience in uk so far. Where do you recommend is must try experience, lifestyle, living cost and absolutely worth taking up ? Reading or London. I liked that reading has a more of Mumbai vibe with indians dominating the city and almost everything owned or run by Indians. Would feel a bit more secure there and more of home vibes, also being part of the dominating community have its own benefits. But never got to experience multiculturalism and got another offer right in the middle of London, but the living cost is putting me off. at end of the day I will be left with lesser saving than what I made with 43k in a small town.

Please recommend what is a better choice?

I am moving out of UK permanently by end of this month. Can anyone recommend how to ideally pack and send your things back to India. What courier service to use? I have like around 5-6 suitcases. Should I take it in same flight and pay for extra baggage or send via courier. what would the approximate cost be? which is cheaper?

My right to work expire on 6th July. I am actively giving work interiviews now in June. by what date should I get a job confirmed and a COS confirmed to safely stay back. And if nothing works out I gotta pack and leave and by what date should I mentally prepare for it and prevent any immigration risk.

So I am not from uk originally . from Asia where disability is still a big taboo and discussing at work would mean end of career. So I am well trained in hiding my disability to survive. But I thought when I came to UK people here are more progressive in terms of openly talking of their disability. But over time what I learnt is observing how my managers reacted and reading lots of these posts here on reddit, it is ultimately the same experience for people with disabilities in uk. a lot of jobs and companies openly express disability confident employers, welcome candidates with disability etc. But in practice most workers with disability are still disadvantaged at work. at high risk of being managed out. even for women who end up getting pregnant or want maternity leave, the risk of getting redundant is more. So basically I dont see a difference in Asia and the uk. The only difference is in Asia the discrimination is on your face and direct. here it will come indirectly through pip/capabilities. Then I wonder whats the point with all these inclusive recruitment and workplace policies when people actually dont believe in implementing them in practice. Why is the workforce here still so. negative towards people with disability ?

I have been in uk for 5 years, now planning to return probably forever end of this month. My job got into a mess with bullying and racism, I dont feel safe to return to the work and the racism towards us is unbearable and career damaging. While switching jobs, my employer turned nasty and gave a misleading references leading to me losing a new job and visa. Now left with no choice, but to return. I am trying to find new sponsor, but mentally given up.

For those who got fed up of having to deal with all the racism and inequality in the west, and made a decision to return. How has it been like living in present day india? Specially for women? Tell me your experience. Is it a bad decision to permanently move back to india?

I know work environment in india is also very toxic. But in India working for 6-7 years, I never felt so isolated and targeted like how I felt in the west. There is no one to support you and these people show no basic decency towards you.

Please tell me as a single older women, what are things I should be prepared to rewire myself and adjust to. And how safe is india currently for women. I honestly do dread all the attack and assault that happens to women on a regular basis in india. Which has never happened to me in 5 years of living abroad, and now I am used to that comfort of safety for women that's a norm here.

Any advice on how to re-adjust in india, do share.

I am someone who worked under UK system for the first time, after having a successful career in my home country, moved here to gain more new skills. I was settling into my job and absolutely loved the learning and growth I got here. However like every foreigner or person of color tend to sometimes felt quite excluded in my workplace. Did not find a big deal out of it, as I usually like being left alone. When it came to work, I always double checked, asked a lot of questions to colleagues, showed curiosity to learn as a new starter. However I was mostly met with frustration from peers whenever I did that. But when someone local did it, it was seen as collaborative work and team work. When I did it, it began to be perceived as I am difficult, I am incompetent, I need exceptional support. A whole different perception was being circulated in the team, and it began to tip into overt forms.

I began to get increasingly upset to the point I felt terrified to be with my team. I tried to request a change of team, but hr asked me to raise a formal complaint otherwise I have to be back in the team. I was naive enough to believe them and raised formal complaint. Things have gone downhill from that time , with retaliation, victimisation, and actively attempting to create a paper trail to establish I am crazy and I am not a good fit. This was unexpected and shocking , as I was dumb to think people would be supportive. I collapsed under pressure and tried looking job elsewhere.

Cleared many jobs, accepted one in London where work environment is more mixed and international , I was pleased to move there. But the references from my company blocked that offer and lost it, also lost my new visa. Now I have to return to my country soon and probably also lose my work. I continue to get interview calls and repeatedly get shortlisted. But dont see any point in it, as the references will definitely block it. My employers are not explicitly giving negative reference, but very coded ones to indirectly highlight I am a bad team fit and exposing my long absense without sharing its work environment that has cost it. WIth limited time left in UK, I do not understand how to move ahead.

I am terrified to return to my workplace where I know they will show no mercy towards me, neither can I take up other job offers as no guarantee of retaining it after reference checks. I have never faced a challenge like this in any job before and I thought employment laws here are much more protective of employees, but experiencing first hand the amount of power companies have to destroy you forever. Cant believe how spiteful HR and organisation can get in the name of being risk-averse. I also get it as a foreigner it's better I go back to where I come from. But this was just not how I thought my hard work in building my career would end after attempting work in uk. I wonder how do locals even survive with jobs when they are at the mercy of HR and policies and managers who can make up bogus stuff to get rid of you. I dont think it's mentally or emotionally possible for ordinary individuals to stand up against such corporations. It's so risky to have a career and peace of mind here if you cant survive work politics. That's so scary.

Question is how do ordinary individuals survive in this kind of system. What do locals here do to retain a job, even if the environment is negatively impacting your health and trying to resolve at work is not happening and getting more complicated. how do you get out of it cleanly ? Or you never do? And just accept your career is over after one bad team?

I raised a formal complaint few months back with my employer for harassment and bullying. It was not upheld but confirmed many uncomfortable situation for me which could have avoided and also recommendations for trainings for the members who caused the distressing situation for me. I was removed from the team but placed under another person I have mentioned in my complaint. I felt stressed and expressed fear of working under them. The organisation go on to then push me into a performance review and found vague concerns against me which never existed before and threatened possible escalation and dismissal if it escalate. I fell more sick with their behaviour and unsafe returning to work and feared slipping into long term depression and panic symptoms in a state of shock at how they suddenly turned everything against me out of no where when I was the one who raised a grievance initially. I tried to find other jobs during my time off and found one, but the employers gave a mixed reference leading to the job being withdrawn. They have given vague details in reference and no clarity leading to hiring organisation to think there is something wrong. Now I have questioned this and not heard anything back from employer. I also am not able to move on to a better environment because employer wont give a neutral reference. What should I do. Why would the HR be so brutal and dont bother about employees at all. I get the need to protect company at all cost, but why ruin my career. If they cant support me why is it hard to give a clean exist. They also dont want me getting other jobs. What is an ideal solution in situation like this. I fear my return to work as the management handled things very poorly when I was sick and spoke in very rough and threatening tone. I cant afford to have another mental health crash again and want to maintain my sanity. I also have other job offers which I cant proceed and would lose if I give the current reference they are giving. What does HR expect from employee in situation like this. I am also absolutely not happy how they handled my grievance and never offered the support that was identified in the report that I need to safely work.