I lost my angel
My Coco fell down my balcony 2 days ago, it's my fault and my negligence that caused this, it happened the day I was coming back home from out of town, my mom did her best to take care of em, I don't blame her,
all i could think about was her as i walked home from the station, i come home and was shocked to find a window to the balcony open, but all the cats were in and excited to see me, but then it hits me that coco isn't anywhere inside, i search everywhere and get anxious, that sinking feeling comes in, she was scared of thunder and it was storming that night,
I went down my apartment she's nowhere and I get a sigh of relief that it didn't happen, but then I talked to our security and he confirms that a cat fell down just an hour ago, it seemed dead so he tossed it out in an abandoned ground nearby and I ran ran ran and found her soaking in the rain in the cold concrete where she was tossed out like she meant nothing, she had died just an hour ago, if I'd come an hour earlier she'd be alive, I hugged her brought her home and dried her after that...this is just too big of a loss to me..
I'm crushed as I write this, i can't even describe this properly but it's just pain, I keep food for her when I feed the rest because she was food crazy, I was obsessed with her, she always took the chance to sneak out, maybe i should have reminded mom to check if all the windows were shut, i used to tell coco that ill take care of you and I'll keep you safe after her mom passed away when she was just a kitten, i bottle fed her and her brother after her mother who was very dear to me passed away of illness just 9 months ago, I'm still grieving for her mother Meeka and now this is all too much for me, I am just way too in love with coco, she would knead on me in the middle of the night, we'd chase each other, her voice and rants, i had songs I'd sing to her, shed purr as soon as i touch a strand of hers, and there's nothing of that anymore, it all feels like a bad dream, it happened an hour before I was supposed to reunite with her, her brother seems quite depressed and keeps howling every now and then... Sometimes it feels like she's still here, so I call out to her every now and then and just sob, i really love you coco