u/Murky_History33

At most I will be something you briefly obsess over until you come to your senses.

I am not looking for a grand romantic connection. So far every one of my relationships has stemmed from a strong friendship, and as a result I don’t have a single ex I wouldn’t call with a flat tire at 2am. I am deeply uncomfortable with emotions and expressions of admiration and never once have I told a partner I loved them and truly meant it.

I work a lot, and don’t have much free time outside of work. I don’t have the patience for dates and if I have to make the same small talk over and over again I might actually just scream. The only person I talk to on the phone is a thousand miles away and we schedule check ins through calendar invites for our commutes. I have unreasonably high standards for myself and everyone I keep in my life and truly do not have the patience for mediocrity.

Here is the small talk, we can get it out of the way here: I am 34, 5’2 (5’2.75 at my rheumatologist’s office), lots of tattoos, a moderate amount of piercings, and currently my hair is what my 22 year old hairstylist calls cherry cola red but I am tired of it. When I’m not working my real job I’m at the gym, and when I’m not at the gym for myself I’m there training clients on weekends. I have a handful of friends that are across the country, and I spent my money on plane tickets to see them and my tattoo artist.

Last week someone called me toxic because I held them to an expectation I clearly outlined from the start.

I’m not looking for a grand romantic connection. So far every one of my relationships has stemmed from a strong friendship, and as a result I don’t have a single ex I wouldn’t call with a flat tire at 2am.

I work a lot, and don’t have much free time outside of work. I don’t have the patience for dates and if I have to make the same small talk over and over again I might actually just scream.

Here is the small talk, we can get it out of the way here: I am 34, 5’2 (5’2.75 at my rheumatologist’s office), lots of tattoos, a moderate amount of piercings, and currently my hair is what my 22 year old hairstylist calls cherry cola red. When I’m not working my real job I’m at the gym, and when I’m not at the gym for myself I’m there training clients. I have a handful of friends that are across the country, and I spent my money on plane tickets to see them.

I’m looking for someone to talk to and coexist with. Just pretend we already know each other. I’m skittish.