FFS advice for a cis GF
Hi friends. I am struggling. (burner account btw) I am a 23 F dating MtF 34. I love my partner. I've never felt this way about anyone. When we met and were friends I had no idea she was trans until she told me when we started becoming romantically involved. I ask for some grace from those reading this post.
We've been together 6 months now and she just told me she asked for a letter of recommendation for FFS. Honestly it gutted me. I had no idea this was something she was interested in. I know it has nothing to do with me and my feelings on the matter are unimportant. At the end of the day I want her to have the care that she needs. But I am heartbroken. It makes me sad that she doesn't see herself the way I see her. I love her features, I fell in love with her face.
I don't know how to approach this conversation with her. As a cis women my relationship to surgery is vastly different than a trans woman's and I fully recognize that. I have always seen it as an industry that weaponizes women's insecurities in order to profit off of it. Maybe thats a controversial opinion, but if my partner were not trans, I would also be just as sad for her to feel that she needs to surgically change her features. But I also understand that facial features that no one else may notice can cause dysphoria for trans people.
I guess what I am seeking here is advice from partners of people who have undergone gender affirming surgeries and from people who have had these surgeries. I don't know how to handle this. I am honestly just sad and saddened by the idea that I would look at the person I love and see someone else. I understand that it's not about me, and it's about getting care that she has wanted/needed for years. I just don't know how to handle or cope with it. I have seen other posts from people who were told to "get over it this isn't about you" but I feel that the issue is a lot deeper than that. I love her and want to be with her, i just don't know how to handle this situation. Thank you to those who took the time to read this.
EDIT:
Thank you to everyone who has offered some advice for me. I really appreciate it and it has been helpful. I am really glad there is a community like this for people to support one another. The idea of talking about my personal life on the internet is difficult so I feel weird responding to every comment, but please know I have read all of them and value that you all took the time to hear me out and respond. I don't have many people other than my therapist that I can talk to about this because no one in my life really knows that my partner is trans, and most people are not very understanding about stuff like this.