I literally can't focus on anything else
so I've been thinking for a a while an I haven't transitioned or started HRT and I think my opinion is invalid when it comes to deciding weather it's a fetish or if I'm really Trans I've watched countless videos self-assured myself multiple times and still I can't known if it's real or not as being a boy it felt meh not dysphonic nor anything just meh never okay or happy every relationship i was in never felt like anything and now without any traditional flags to point this out I'm soo lost and deeply and not once have i ever actually fell in love with anyone it was either peer-pressure and such my female friend also has asked me if I'm gay or not and neither did i enjoy that title so I started to identify as non-binary but when I mention planning to transition it feels like im pretending or lying and that makes me deeply uncomfortable and i don't want it to be true so i tried to prove to myself it is but I just can't say yes i'm trans without confirmation it's been in distress about this for soo long (note sorry if it sounds rushed cause it was)