u/N3verendingN1ght

Okay just to start, I know this is totally my fault. I just need to vent but I feel like I overshot on the CAO and it somehow only dawned on me now that I could very likely not get any of my top choices. My “safety” choices (which aren’t even that safe tbh) are two of the humanities joint honour type courses in UCD (DN520 and DN530), but now I’m worried I won’t get a space in them. I think I might get around 480 points, and those two courses have like 400(?) spaces in total between the two, so hopefully?

My top options were mixes of various humanities in the trinity joint honours, and that’s about it. So ultimately I’m cooked. If only complaining on reddit was a course, because it seems like that’s all I’m doing rn.

This is literally eating away at me, does anyone else feel like this? I feel so dumb since 90% of my exams went poorly and now I might not even get into college. Idk why I’ve been like this, I used to be so much better at doing things.

I’m not exaggerating when I say that I made a mess of every single exam. I just feel so so disappointed because I worked really hard all year and it feels like it was a waste in the end. I’m not even sure why I did so badly, I don’t know what’s wrong with me.

I think it feels the worst that all the subjects I’m usually really good at went the worst, and now there’s absolutely no way in hell I’m getting my top choice. I feel like shit and I know I just have to move on and deal with it but I really just feel awful about myself and how the exams went. Not one single exam went well for me despite me working so hard. Does anyone else feel like this? I hope I’m not alone

I’m not sure if it’s easy to check since I (18) have never had sex but even trying to insert a tampon is incredibly painful. I’ve stopped using them and just use pads instead.

I’ve tried to use my fingers before to get used to penetration but I barely got a few centimetres in before it felt like I physically couldn’t go further and it really hurt. Recently I got a sex toy since I thought maybe my fingers were the problem but the same issue occurred and it just felt like there was something blocking it from going further.
I made sure to prepare and feel relaxed and I took breaths but nothing worked. It just wouldn’t go in without even when I tried to push but I didn’t want to force anything in since I know that’s really bad for you.

I’m not sure what to do, it isn’t a huge problem but I do want to be able to have penetrative sex and use tampons. I can’t afford to go to the doctor to get them to check. I’ve heard that vaginal dilators can help but I’m worried I’ll spend the money and it still won’t make anything better.

Is there any advice I could get? Does this sound like vaginismus or something else?

Title kinda explains it all but I feel like I’m going to die. I want like 550 in the actual thing and I got 500 points in the mocks but tbf my English and art exams were graded completely incorrectly. It just feels like I know nothing right now.

Logically I know that I’ve been doing my best and studying consistently but right now it feels like I don’t know anything. I get anywhere between 5-8 hours a day done and I’m exhausted but somehow still don’t feel like I know anything.

I’m terrified even for the subjects I’m usually okay at, like what if all this time my teachers have just been gassing me up and I’m actually awful?? It’s so stupid but I’m so freaked out rn and I needed to vent