u/Neurosciencesigma

Hi! This is my second year as a para, and this year I was placed with a different grade level. I’ve actually really enjoyed the change. I like the students, I get along well with the teaching team, and I feel like I’m starting to establish my own role within the team.

The issue is that the para who worked with this grade level last year was placed with a different grade this year, but she keeps coming back to our team whenever her new duty is finished.

At first, I didn’t think much of it. We’re coworkers and obviously she knows these teachers better than I do in some ways. But it has become pretty consistent. She’ll come into the classrooms, follow the team around, interact with students, and sometimes reprimand students who are now part of my assigned group. It almost feels like she’s still trying to occupy her old role even though she has a completely different assignment.

There was also some history between her and one of the students last year that made her previous placement difficult, so I can understand why she might still feel attached to this group. I don’t necessarily blame her for missing the team or wanting to check in.
But honestly, I feel uncomfortable.

Part of me feels like I’m constantly competing with her for space and recognition within my own assignment. I’m trying to build relationships with these students and establish myself with the teachers, and then she comes in and takes over interactions because she already knows everyone.

I also feel weird because her old team doesn’t seem particularly interested in having her around anymore. I don’t want to interpret that too much, but I’ve noticed she seems to get brushed off sometimes, which makes me wonder if that’s part of why she keeps coming back to her old team.

For comparison, I was placed with a different grade level this year too, and I intentionally try not to insert myself into my old team’s classrooms once I’m done with my duties. I still say hi and care about those students, but I recognize that I’m no longer part of that team.

I don’t want to be territorial or tell another para where she can and can’t go. I just wish she would let the new team establish their own dynamic and let me have the space to develop my own role.

Am I being unreasonable, or is this something I should bring up with someone?

I’m a paraeducator at an elementary school and I’m currently in a SPED credential program. My goal is to become a Mild/Moderate Education Specialist, so I’ve been applying/interviewing for SPED teaching positions. I haven’t landed one yet, so for now I’m staying at my current school while I wait for the right opportunity.
Last year I was assigned to fourth grade. I didn’t necessarily feel like I clicked with the team socially, and there was definitely some awkwardness, but professionally I did really well. They consistently called me proactive, a “go-getter,” and praised my work ethic. I was trusted with small groups, student referrals, recess responsibilities, etc. They also encouraged me to pursue teaching because they saw potential in me. So even though I didn’t feel super connected to that team, they really helped build my confidence professionally.
Near the end of last year, I told people that I was planning to leave because I was trying to transition into a teaching position. At the time, I genuinely thought I was going to be leaving, so I was pretty open about it. Looking back, I kind of regret announcing that I was trying to leave because I had no idea what was actually going to happen. I didn’t know that I would end up returning, getting reassigned to a completely different grade level, and actually liking the new team as much as I do.
This year I was reassigned to third grade, which has a HUGE number of students and honestly seems like a pretty demanding grade level. The third-grade team has been really welcoming so far. I have four teachers I’m working with and I’m getting to know each classroom’s culture and expectations. I’ve already been helping with organization, classroom tasks, technology issues, student support, etc. One little girl has already decided I’m her favorite teacher and literally drew a picture of herself and me 😭. My team lead even thanked me for helping and told me my timing was impeccable.
I’m actually starting to really like third grade, which I didn’t expect. I’m trying to build rapport with the teachers and students naturally rather than coming in and acting like I know everything.
The weird part is that my old fourth-grade team has been somewhat standoffish since I came back. I think part of it may be that they were surprised when I returned after I had previously told them I was trying to leave. They also seemed disappointed that I wasn’t going to be assigned to them anymore. I still see my former fourth graders around campus and they’re always waving, hugging me, and saying hi, which is really sweet. I’ll say hi if I naturally see them, but I’m intentionally NOT going into fourth grade constantly or inserting myself into their classroom. I don’t want to make things awkward or interfere with their current para.
There’s also a former third-grade para who was moved out of that team last year after some conflict with a student and admin involvement. She and I are close, so I know the situation from her perspective. She has been coming in and out of the third-grade classrooms fairly often, including while I’m trying to establish myself with the new team. The third-grade team seems somewhat distant with her now, and I’ve noticed some parallels between how they interact with her and how my old fourth-grade team interacts with me.
At one point she came into the third-grade team lead’s classroom and the team lead made a comment along the lines of, “She probably still thinks she’s the third-grade para.” I didn’t engage in the drama. I just said something like, “I think everyone got their para assignments yesterday.” I’m not trying to take sides or make anything weird.
I’m basically in this weird middle ground where I genuinely like my current third-grade team and could see myself staying at this school for a while, but I’m still trying to become a teacher. I don’t want to completely mentally check out of my current job just because I’m looking for something else, especially because I actually enjoy this team more than I expected.
At the same time, I don’t want to give up on the Education Specialist search. I’m treating my current job as my safety net while I wait for the right teaching opportunity rather than taking another para transfer just for the sake of transferring.
I’m wondering how other educators would handle this kind of situation.
I’m trying to establish myself as part of my new third-grade team, build rapport with the students, and learn their routines. At the same time, I don’t want to seem like I’m abandoning my old team or acting cold toward my former students. And I definitely don’t want to be constantly hanging around fourth grade or making it look like I’m trying to reclaim my old position.
Would you just let the old team dynamics settle naturally and focus on building relationships with the new team? And has anyone else ever announced they were leaving a school/position, only for circumstances to change and suddenly find themselves staying? How did you handle the awkwardness?

I’m a paraeducator at an elementary school and I’m currently in a SPED credential program. My goal is to become a Mild/Moderate Education Specialist, so I’ve been applying/interviewing for SPED teaching positions. I haven’t landed one yet, so for now I’m staying at my current school while I wait for the right opportunity.
Last year I was assigned to fourth grade. I didn’t necessarily feel like I clicked with the team socially, and there was definitely some awkwardness, but professionally I did really well. They consistently called me proactive, a “go-getter,” and praised my work ethic. I was trusted with small groups, student referrals, recess responsibilities, etc. They also encouraged me to pursue teaching because they saw potential in me. So even though I didn’t feel super connected to that team, they really helped build my confidence professionally.
Near the end of last year, I told people that I was planning to leave because I was trying to transition into a teaching position. At the time, I genuinely thought I was going to be leaving, so I was pretty open about it. Looking back, I kind of regret announcing that I was trying to leave because I had no idea what was actually going to happen. I didn’t know that I would end up returning, getting reassigned to a completely different grade level, and actually liking the new team as much as I do.
This year I was reassigned to third grade, which has a HUGE number of students and honestly seems like a pretty demanding grade level. The third-grade team has been really welcoming so far. I have four teachers I’m working with and I’m getting to know each classroom’s culture and expectations. I’ve already been helping with organization, classroom tasks, technology issues, student support, etc. One little girl has already decided I’m her favorite teacher and literally drew a picture of herself and me 😭. My team lead even thanked me for helping and told me my timing was impeccable.
I’m actually starting to really like third grade, which I didn’t expect. I’m trying to build rapport with the teachers and students naturally rather than coming in and acting like I know everything.
The weird part is that my old fourth-grade team has been somewhat standoffish since I came back. I think part of it may be that they were surprised when I returned after I had previously told them I was trying to leave. They also seemed disappointed that I wasn’t going to be assigned to them anymore. I still see my former fourth graders around campus and they’re always waving, hugging me, and saying hi, which is really sweet. I’ll say hi if I naturally see them, but I’m intentionally NOT going into fourth grade constantly or inserting myself into their classroom. I don’t want to make things awkward or interfere with their current para.
There’s also a former third-grade para who was moved out of that team last year after some conflict with a student and admin involvement. She and I are close, so I know the situation from her perspective. She has been coming in and out of the third-grade classrooms fairly often, including while I’m trying to establish myself with the new team. The third-grade team seems somewhat distant with her now, and I’ve noticed some parallels between how they interact with her and how my old fourth-grade team interacts with me.
At one point she came into the third-grade team lead’s classroom and the team lead made a comment along the lines of, “She probably still thinks she’s the third-grade para.” I didn’t engage in the drama. I just said something like, “I think everyone got their para assignments yesterday.” I’m not trying to take sides or make anything weird.
I’m basically in this weird middle ground where I genuinely like my current third-grade team and could see myself staying at this school for a while, but I’m still trying to become a teacher. I don’t want to completely mentally check out of my current job just because I’m looking for something else, especially because I actually enjoy this team more than I expected.
At the same time, I don’t want to give up on the Education Specialist search. I’m treating my current job as my safety net while I wait for the right teaching opportunity rather than taking another para transfer just for the sake of transferring.
I’m wondering how other educators would handle this kind of situation.
I’m trying to establish myself as part of my new third-grade team, build rapport with the students, and learn their routines. At the same time, I don’t want to seem like I’m abandoning my old team or acting cold toward my former students. And I definitely don’t want to be constantly hanging around fourth grade or making it look like I’m trying to reclaim my old position.
Would you just let the old team dynamics settle naturally and focus on building relationships with the new team? And has anyone else ever announced they were leaving a school/position, only for circumstances to change and suddenly find themselves staying? How did you handle the awkwardness?

Hi everyone,
I’m looking for a little guidance (and maybe some reassurance) from people who’ve been through this before.
I’m in California and starting a Mild/Moderate Education Specialist credential program this fall. My goal is to be hired as an intern teacher, so I’ve been applying for teaching positions since March. I’ve interviewed, been placed on an eligibility list with one district, have applications active in several others, and my university internship coordinator has even been reaching out to administrators on my behalf.
The problem is… I still don’t have an offer.
School starts in about a week for most districts around me, and I’m starting to get anxious. I know special education hiring can continue into the school year, and my internship coordinator keeps reminding me not to lose hope, but it’s hard not to feel like I’m running out of time.
The good news is that I’m currently employed as a paraeducator, so I do have a stable job to fall back on. The awkward part is that I already told everyone at my current school site that I was planning to leave for a teaching position. Everyone was excited for me, and now I’m honestly embarrassed to go back if I don’t get hired. At this point, I’m considering transferring to another school within my district while I continue searching, just so I can keep working until I find an intern position.
For those of you who became intern teachers or were looking for your first special education job:
Did you get hired before school started, or after?
How late into the school year do districts continue hiring intern teachers?
If you were already working as a para, would you transfer sites and keep waiting, or just stay where you were?
Any advice for managing the uncertainty?
I’m trying to stay optimistic because I know special education is a field with a lot of movement, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t feeling discouraged right now. I’d really appreciate hearing from anyone who’s been in a similar situation.

This is embarrassing, but I’m genuinely curious from an administrator’s perspective.
I’m 24F and really early into my education career. I worked summer school for about three weeks and was intentionally trying to network with administrators because I eventually want to move into a permanent SPED position.
One of the principals (41M) was one of the most charismatic people I’ve ever met.
Certified DILF.
Salt-and-pepper hair, glasses, built, funny, confident, incredibly warm, remembered conversations we’d had, checked in on me throughout the day, encouraged me professionally, and just had the kind of personality that makes everyone feel important.
Somewhere along the way I developed the most ridiculous crush.
Nothing inappropriate ever happened.
He was always professional.
I was always professional.
…at least I THINK I was.
Looking back, though, I realized I did a few things that make me cringe.
I always greeted him way more enthusiastically than everyone else.
I was constantly hoping he’d stop by my classroom.
I caught myself staring at him more than I’d like to admit.
I somehow managed to ask him what his favorite Cutwater was on a field trip instead of asking literally anything career-related.
My brain also unfortunately noticed he wasn’t wearing a wedding ring.
He also keeps showing up in my dreams now, which is a whole separate issue.
My question is…
As principals or administrators…
Can you usually tell when one of your newer staff members has a harmless little workplace crush on you?
Or are people way more subtle than they think?
Looking back, I feel like I was internally freaking out while trying to act completely normal.
Meanwhile maybe he just thought,
“She’s a nice enthusiastic para.”
Or maybe he knew the entire time and was just kind enough to pretend he didn’t.
Please be honest because my friends are split between:
“He definitely knew.”
and
“Girl he probably didn’t think twice about it.”
I’m prepared to be humbled. 😭