I might still love my wife, but I don't like her anymore. RANT
If you're tired of my childhood trauma coming out, do yourself a favor and stop treating me like your my mother. It's really that simple. No wonder you're not attracted to me anymore. You're so hypervigilant around me all the time. Here's a question; why do YOU work so hard to continue this marriage?
If I'm so horrible, why not just serve me papers? I'm not going to fight you on it. This relationship works because I keep rolling over and giving in. What makes you think that would change in a divorce? Unless you try to pull something stupid on me, I would never allow my children to live part of their time in an unsafe home. I will always do right by my girls, even if I can not stand you. You're always crying, all the time. If I'm so "horrible and abusive," just leave. You have money, more than I do. The kids will stay on my health insurance, so the only thing you need is to cover yourself, and you can sign on to our business's plan like any other employee. You are not without agency. If you are so unhappy, take responsibility and do something about it.
Or maybe I'm not so impossible. Maybe I'm not the reason for everything wrong in your life. Maybe I'm a convenient scapegoat for when it's too hard to take responsibility for your self. Maybe not everything is my fault. Maybe I should stop rolling over and sweeping how I feel under the rug. Maybe I stay because I have to work, and someone has to be home with the kids, so why divorce and pay lawyers when you would just end up with the house and the kids anyway? You hold all the cards, and yet somehow it is all my fault.