u/Nggachu

My dad gave trauma to my mom, and then she passes it to me every day via verbal/mental abuse…
My dad isn't in the house with us, only mom, her bro and I
My methods were very weird , VERY WEIRD…..pls don’t judge lol
So , here were my unhinged , weird ways for coping:

1. Normalising it
   Didn’t work
   Why: I normalised every single word she said , such as bish, h0re , s|ut….and I started to BELIEVE THAT I was all those words even tho I’ve never been in a relationship neither lost my virginia .
   And then, this later back fired I started liking….not that this ever happened or this will ever happen…I started craving this one kink that is degr@dation and slight sm things that I can't even say in this sub) js as fantasy, I only like the staged ones not too much gore)

2.Using headset to avoid bad words
Didn’t work
Why: She would shout and say bad words louder than the songs I was hearing

3.Watching corn and feeling corny
Works…
Why: as that's the only amount of smile/happiness I feel in my everyday life …at all…
But my mom obviously can hear me through the bathroom using the water thingy , gurls ifykyk…..and she asks what I do in the bathroom , I js deny…

Please provide advice that I can apply in my life 🙏
Thank you