u/Nice_Length_5473

After 8 months of being unemployed, I finally got an offer from a startup that's just beginning, but the whole thing seems to be heading in a bad direction. I was very clear about my expected salary and some basic benefits from the very beginning. The interview process was long - 6 stages besides the take-home project. A couple of days ago, they sent me the official offer letter, and honestly, I was shocked. The salary was much lower than what we had agreed upon, and the benefits we discussed were completely missing.

I replied to them and asked them to review the numbers to match what we had previously discussed. They responded with two options: one with a salary close to what I asked for but with most of the benefits removed, and the other with the initial low salary but with all the benefits.

So I responded with another counteroffer. I suggested we split the difference in salary, keep all the benefits, and add a small signing bonus to be paid after I've been with them for a few months.

After that, I got a call from them, and the tone was a bit tense. In short, they said that the first offer they made was already a stretch for this position, and they only offered it because they believe I could really help them grow. Honestly, I feel like they're playing games, as if they're testing how desperate I am.

I sent them a polite but firm email with my final counteroffer for them to consider before Monday. The interview process itself was excellent and I really liked the team, but this negotiation part is leaving a bitter taste in my mouth...

Earlier this week, I received a job offer for $118K for a professional role in downtown Boston. I countered at $138K, which was about 16% higher than their initial offer. The next morning after I sent the counteroffer, the company withdrew the offer and said they would move forward with other candidates. Honestly, I was shocked that they didn't come back with another number, ask any questions, or try to discuss it at all. I had gone through 6 interviews with them to get to that stage, including one with the COO, plus a lot of back-and-forth communication with HR.

The original offer felt a bit lower than expected for the city, especially given my background and what I was seeing in the market. If they had split the difference and gotten to around $128K, I probably would have accepted immediately. What confused me more than the number was how quickly they shut the whole thing down. No counteroffer, no "that's outside our range," nothing. Maybe they had another candidate they liked more during the roughly 3-day period between making the offer and withdrawing it.

But did I make a mistake? Did I push too hard? Was it unreasonable for me to expect them to at least come to a number somewhere in the middle between their first offer and my counteroffer? Looking back on it now, maybe I should have asked for $128K from the start, but that's easy to say after it's all over.

I know it's hard to judge this without knowing the role, my qualifications, the company, and so on. I think I'm just looking for your initial impressions: does this look like I overplayed it, or did they act strangely?