This was most probably discussed before, but I just want to vent. Anyways, let's have a minute of silence and sympathy for Lysa Tully, especially for the woman that could be if not for a single heinous crime perpetrated by her father (and his maester).
So, I was reading the comments for the post describing the failings of Jon Arryn as Hand of the King, and one phrase in particular caught my eye, in a comment that I otherwise agree with:
>Jon Arryn wasn't even good at being a father. His son Robert (if it's even his own and not cuckolded by Petyr Baelish) is probably drugged and sucks tits at 6 years of age.
While Jon Arryn has undoubtedly failed as a father, the initial fault lies with Hoster Tully. In one of Caitlyn's chapters, her father in his deathbed delirium confuses her with Lysa
>Forgive me. Tansy ... blood ... the blood ... gods be kind ...
In case someone missed it or forgot, Lysa got pregnant from Petyr and tried to persuade her father to allow her to marry him. Hoster Tully, being the Great Lord, was having none of it, and together with his maester and unbeknownst to Lysa fed her moon/tansy tea. She nearly died from the poisoning, according to the wikis. Later, Lysa did figure it out, which is the reason she ignored her father even on his deathbed, without so much as sending a letter.
>... I gave you my maiden's gift. I would have given you a son too, but they murdered him with moon tea, with tansy and mint and wormwood, a spoon of honey and a drop of pennyroyal. It wasn't me, I never knew, I only drank what Father gave me ...
Holy shit, I'm a man, and I doubt I could ever really feel the sheer horror of the situation even with all my empathy. Nevertheless, I have chills just simply re-reading this quote. Poor girl, having a forced abortion in such a brutal and perfidious manner, by her own father no less.
In the (Hoster's) end, Caitlyn figures out just how it came to be that a powerful Lord of the Vale took in a "soiled" younger daughter as his new wife.
>Father, I know what you did. You made him take her. Lysa was the price Jon Arryn had to pay for the swords and spears of House Tully.
So, Jon took Lysa while being persuaded by her father that while the girl may be soiled, but is certainly fertile. What these two dumbfucks decided to ignore was the actual poisoning of a young woman's body.
By the time of this marriage, third in his life, Jon Arryn wasn't that young anymore. There's a medical opinion, seemingly well-proven these days, that a man's reproductive health has its own "clock", just like a woman's, albeit ticking slower (maybe). To but it bluntly, his seed wasn't strong anymore. Combine it with a woman's health ravaged by literally toxic substance, and ... you get the idea.
So, by the time Robert "Sweetrobin" Arryn is born, Lysa has grown deeply traumatized by her overall experiences. Let's fucking round it up:
- adolescent hearbreak. Although her basically raping Petyr doesn't give her any good rep, she kinda got her instant karma when he called her, in his delirium, by her sister's name. And she still held on to him, the silly girl. Still, I don't think it made her deserving of what came next
- not only she was forbidden by her father to marry the guy she loved (let's omit the fact that Petyr didn't love her as well, she was oblivious to it and anyways not the point), but
- let's repeat. HER. OWN. FATHER. POISONED. HER while simultaneously forcing an abortion without her knowledge. This is an ultimate betrayal. I am fully on board with Lysa never forgiving him for this. I believe forgiveness has its limits and this is well beyond them. I wonder what the woman part of this fandom has to say on the matter, especially those who are already mothers themselves. I strongly suspect that nothing positive.
- then she was shipped off to a man much older than her and completely unknown to her like a bargaining chip that every young noble woman in Westeros is. While it's kinda "the order of things" in-universe, Martin's writing suggests that women are quite aware of the fact and have quite differing opinions on the matter.
- two (!) miscarriages ending in stillbirth. I guess I don't need to point out just what a horrible experience that is.
- she has to live in King's Landing, in the viper nest of the Red Keep, away from her birthplace, friends and any famly that she still has affection to. Although this may be not so bad due to aforementioned betrayal, her envy for her sister and the fact that she's reunited with Petyr.
So, yeah, my take is that poor Sweetrobin never had a fucking chance. He was lucky to be born more or less whole and alive at all, his mother was mentally broken by this point, and his father was preoccupied by trying to rule the damn kingdom while the King whored and drunk himself senseless.
That's not to excuse Jon Arryn, tho', he did botch his fatherhood.
PS. On the topic of Lysa's potential bastard, one with a Westerosi noble man's mindset might ask "Well what the hell Hoster Tully was supposed to do?" My personal answer is "MOTHERFUCKER, ANYTHING instead of poisoning your own daughter". At least let the child be born, ship it off to some decent folks among your vassals. Hell, even your servants, for that matter. Let Lysa visit a child once in a while, I dunno. It's still inhumane by our modern standards, and Lysa would be "besmirched" for all the realm to see. Well, what can you do, shit happens, grandpa, your younger daughter is a fool. Still not an excuse to brutally and treacherously poison her, which, by the way, nearly ended in her death.