i’m just a baby lol
i have never posted on here or honestly never even looked on here i just kind of feel like i have no one to talk to about this kind of thing.
i have always been interested in crystals my whole life. might be controversial in this sub i don’t know lol. i had a pregnancy loss in 2023 and have had no luck since. probably about six months ago i started a crystal grid on a vision board of us having a baby.
for some reason i decided to pick up tarot. i use a beginner learning deck based on rider waite. i do a card of the day.
last week i went to a town south of boston. i have never had a reading. i had an 8 card oracle done and she clocked me. the whole left side of my spread was all throat & the whole right side was crown. she told me she saw a baby boy. she had no clue where i was from i didn’t sign anything these people didn’t know anything about me. she started talking to me about california, but really specifically the desert. i live in vegas but she said the only desert area she had ever been to on the west coast was in california. idk maybe just random lol. then she did a 2 card spread of problem & solution. (back story: last month i had to go on fmla from my job as a teacher because of stress, and my husband and i have been talking about opening a childcare for two years and i decided last week it’s happening in january). she pulled rest & self employment.
i also did an aura photo with a reiki. once again this lady knew absolutely nothing about me. i don’t know how much i really believe the aura photography thing though lol, my aura was red and i had on a neon red/ orange outfit. the right side was kind of orange and the left side was kind of yellow. i had a black line going through the left side and a white halo above my head which she said . she said a woman spirit was with me. i went to my grandmas celebration of life an hour after that. she also randomly started talking to me about arizona and the desert. again i’m from vegas but they both mentioned the desert???
that night we played uno. i feel like i almost blacked out or something. i remember my entire hand kept being 7 and 5 cards jumping then it became 4 and 1. i somehow knew it was 9 months wrote down in my phone notes. i don’t know if it was for me or who. i remember looking at my sister who is younger than me who is also struggling for a first time pregnancy and i got sad thinking she isn’t going to have a baby until she’s 28. i would love for it to be me getting pregnant in july and have a baby in august but realistically my husband has a medical condition where that is not gonna happen any time soon. i don’t know how to read a normal deck of cards though and it’s obviously not suits i just immediately connected it was 9 months.
anyways yesterday i did my first tarot pull in probably a week since vacation. i have ALWAYS put all my card suit the same direction. i open the box and the only card that is faced suit up on very top was the magician upright. manifestation.
i just cannot stop thinking about this. i can’t find my pendulum anywhere. i put everything back into my little altar area and its gone. maybe it feel off and went with the laundry i don’t know just. today was upright two of cups. i feel kind of lost on where to go from here. i don’t know what i am seeing if it’s supposed to be work or pregnancy or money or what.