u/No-Sign2456

can you get back to a normal life if you have the genetics for this? i just feel if you get cirs without the genes you have a better chance. i have 2 MOLD ONLY genes and i just have this bad feeling im not going to get back to normal no matter how hard i try. i’m so depressed and just cry 247.. mold is in every home, every building. i don’t want to live like this if i can’t just get back to normal again.

i keep coming here to vent and ramble because i literally just can’t cope with any of this.

how can i go from having a home for my family and my kids and everything we wanted or need, peace, comfort? being a 25 yr old woman working the job i love, getting extremely active in the gym, losing weight and feeling so strong, taking care of my kids alone and independently, running the show and loving my life, met my fiance and things just seemed to be falling into place.

3 years later lost everything.
our rental home that meant the world to me.
living too furniture.
kitchen appliances.
laundry appliances.
clothes.
shoes.
kids bedrooms, toys, stuffies..
my health.
memories just gone.
money.
money.
money.
money we do not have.
thrown into the fucking garbage.
TWICE.
my independence.
my life.
my body.
my brain.
my sanity.

i do no recognize myself anymore.
i’m not the same anymore.
i’m fucking mortified and traumatized.

my family relationship is strained.
my relationship with my fiance is strained.
it’s horrible.
everyone is moving on in the world, buying homes, getting married, going on vacations.
hell my baby brother is outliving his best life and my family is so proud of him.
can’t relate.
i haven’t been on a vacation with my kids and family in 2-3 years.

everyone says make your health a priority be frugal with spending.
when you’re low income family already there’s no frugal. there’s still bills and always will be bills. kids in sports. in school. i’m not depriving my kids of normal life when their world has been flipped upside down. that’s just the fucking reality of our economy and people are already suffering financially without CIRS.

i’m 28 years old with nothing in my name, nothing to my name. i bring home less than $900 every 2 weeks. don’t forget the bill. rent. power. internet ( yes for me and my family ) groceries and whatever else.

i fucked up my credit really just from being careless and stupid.
i cannot get a loan if i wanted one.
i cannot max out credit cards to pay for CIRS treatments.
i couldn’t even tell you who the fuck remediates mold in my area let alone - the “ right “ way. honestly, no one gives a fuck.

what the fuck do i do?
everyone is unaffected but me.
no one is sick but me.
everyone is TIRED of the hell i’ve drug them through the last year and wants it to be OVER.

ME TOO.

we are moving again this weekend. the best place we’ve ever found. i’ve been stalling because i am scared but we do not have the money and are not wasting $100s on mold testing kits just to fucking lose our shit when we never find a CIRS perfect home because they do not exist in the world.

sorry but they don’t esp. when you’re renting.

i’m scared to move in and my family gets comfortable and i get sick.
i have to provide.
i am a mother.
i HAVE TO WORK.
I HAVE NO MONEY. NO SAVINGS. NO FAMILY MONEY. NO HUSBAND MONEY.
NO ONE TO TAKE CARE OF US TO FALL BACK ON IF I CAN’T. my fiance doesn’t make enough to hold the entire family!!
this is NOT ME!!!
this home is better than where we have been anything we have looked at in the last year but if i get sick - that’s it???

so you’re telling me my whole fucking life i’ve had 2 mold genes and was FINE til that past home just fucking broke me? my life is over bc of invisible issues and dead skin cells…?

now i can barely walk, stand, and can only drive to and from work. do not enjoy life at all anymore. there’s just no good anymore. just chaos. just mold. just sickness.

are you fucking joking? i’m not trying to be a dumb bitch but like i wanna life again. i want to get my hair done. i want to go to the gym again. i want to go on a vacation with my family. i want to drive with the music blasting with the windows down. i wanna have a drink again. i want farm animals. i want my ducks and chickens. kids running bare feet in the mud. jumping on the trampoline &. playing in the water hose. i wanna have fun. i want my life!! I AM A 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN!!

went from living my best life to pure fucking brutal hell.

i’m just at the point where i know i cannot afford this. i do not want to continue taking my family from home to home to home to home to home and losing everything over and over and over again bc eventually you lose your fiance. you lose your family. you lose your kids.

i’m not fucking built for this.

i can’t do it.

if something doesn’t give i’m at my breaking point. i’m tired of hurting my family and feeling enormous pain and grief for everyone around me and everyone hating me!

this is NOT “ CIRS BRAIN “ this is brutal honest reality brain.

has anyone’s religious views changed dramatically since the development of CIRS, mold toxicity and losing everything more than once?

has anyone actually used moldco and seen any results and improvement?

did anyone else’s CIRS hit them seemingly at the most perfect time in their life? in 2022 when i moved into the house that caused CIRS later on and had no choice but to leave in 2025 and lose everything we’ve worked so hard for, after years in that house seeing every specialist you can think of, constantly making notes and getting labs drawn and trying different medication for anxiety, depression, autoimmune disease.. hydroxychloroquine and steroids. before i moved into that house i was heavily in the gym, strict diet & weight lifting. energetic, full of life and healthy. i had lost atleast 50lbs and was in the best shape of my life mentally and physically, also super active and reliable to my job ( that still means everything to me ) but now its so hard and been so hard ive had to miss a week a time and go back still flaring bad to the point i can’t walk good. but the bills and life doesnt stop when you’re chronically ill. it’s taken and ruined so much of my life in the last for years the last year especially. moving numerous of times, losing more money, more belongings, losing relationships with my family members this has stripped me of everything. i’ve always been super caring and emotional person. i wear my heart on my sleeve. i’ve never known such evil as CIRS. just wished i knew what i did to deserve this.

moms with cirs.. parents with cirs.

what are we doing??

we have lost everything in the last year due to MY CIRS and about to move again and i’m mortified ill get sick again, with my family 4 and 2 working adults ( i still have my job thankfully ) we are barely making ends meet paying rent + bills + kids.. i am so extremely worried ill get sicker and we will have no where to go this time. living with family isn’t safe for me either, and everyone wants their lives back. i do not blame them. my family is ready to move on, get into this place and find stability and so am i.. this has all been a complete nightmare and im so worried ill lose my fiance and my kids if this doesn’t work out. i cannot afford a CIRS dr. i’ve called everyone listed on the shoemaker map, i cannot afford $600-$800–$1000 apts. life just doesn’t stop bc you have CIRS day to day expenses with school aged children who are in sports and bills don’t stop.

how are we doing this??

i wasn’t even like this just 4 years ago, why is this my life now? am i doomed forever with 2 mold genes? is my life over bc i can’t get a dr? will i lose my kids bc of CIRS? i’m sorry but if CIRS isn’t known within the medical system you cannot put your self and your kids in a TENT! i’ll never be able to afford a “ CIRS safe “ home. i just want stability back for my family. it’s caused so much trauma for everyone.

please tell me this isn’t forever. please tell me i can heal without a CIRS dr. i’m not even 30 yet and have lost everything, have nothing to my name at this point.

it’s not reasonable to stop all exposures. to stop grocery shopping. to stop living a life. to keep replacing everyones belongings in a family of 4. if i left my job due to mold exposure i wouldn’t even be able to pay rent, get any type of meds, at all. and we’d lose any stability even more so.

please tell me there is hope without a dr. without a “ perfect CIRS home “. can goo enough BE ENOUGH??

what are some things you did in your “ not so CIRS perfect “ home to help you heal?

we have viewed so many homes and can’t find anything safe. i’m dragging my family of 4 thru the mud because i have cirs. i am 28 years old finding all of this out this year and why i have been so sick. losing our first home, another renal & no one has the budget for this we legitimately cannot fund CIRS safe housing or a dr. we signed a lease to rental and finding issues after doing all we can to make it safe. i’m to scared to even spend the night. my family needs a home. i just want to be normal again. i can’t live in a world with 2 mold genes. i have let my family down. i am going to lose them. i do not know what to do anymore. i do not want to be alive. i feel as if i am to sensitive for the world and i cannot fathom losing everyone in time and i know i will. i am a burden. my life is completely over and i do not want to live like this. i feel like a small child lost and afraid. it’s to chaotic. to crazy. trauma. to much sickness. uncertainty. my family is fed up with me. i am going to lose my fiance. my family. i am so lost in this world. no one can live like this. there’s nothing else i can do. we cannot afford a cirs safe house. we cannot move to another state. i’ve brought on so much trouble with CIRS it’s awful.

I need some real, honest feedback from people who actually understand CIRS and the HLA-DR genes, because my nervous system is in complete burnout and I am terrified. Over the last year, I’ve had to move twice and basically lose all of our earthly possessions both times because of toxic mold exposures (a 1900 build our first rental home of 3 years, I was fine til I wasn’t, wasn’t sick prior to that home and had no idea of hidden mold/leaks whatsoever, had no idea that CIRS was even possible issue.. yeah, ..then into a 1980 house that sat empty for 7 years ( unbeknownst to me ) had major humidity issues & musty basement and had to leave within 6 weeks bc of a huge flare for me, the actual sickest I had ever been and I didn’t know at the time I had CIRS just knew mold was the culprit. Right now, my family and I are stuck in my grandparents house with an active bedroom ceiling leak, high humidity, and no HVAC & a multitude of issues. We have had to live here bc we have no where else to go. My labs are still a mess, and I'm living at a functional but shitty baseline. Do not ask me why and how I even feel better here from other homes bc with the looks of the house and the issues I don’t know. But each time I come back here from exposures and being extremely sick my labs lower and stay at a bad but stable position and minus flares I do have a functioning baseline even if it’s shitty. We just signed a lease on a 17-year-old manufactured home because we desperately needed to escape the active leak and because we cannot stay with family forever. It’s just awful. Structurally, it seems like the safest thing we’ve found and honestly in our position will ever find.

The roof was completely replaced last year under warranty.

No history of leaks inside.

They do own rental properties and a previous one she had available I had asked about water damage and leaks, she said yes on a different property that did have issues the were fixing. I do not see why she would lie about this home and confirm water damage renovations in another one.

Another thing, this home was their FIRST home bought 17 years ago and they brought 2 babies home and raised them there. They took well care of it, and take care of their properties.

No major renovations because I seen photos from the inside 5 years ago, it is the same. Not even been painted.

All hard floors, zero carpet.

The HVAC system is less than 2 years old and runs great.

I checked under the sinks and inside the floor vents, and they do NOT smell at all or have any visible mold at ALL.

No sagging in underbelly and everything is intact.

No mold behind or inside back of toilets.

All floors and walls are rock solid.

We used a flash light and checked every inch of the ceiling for any water damage at all. Absolutely none.

The trailer sits elevated on concrete cinder blocks, and the skirting is currently broken/open in some spots, from rocks hitting it with weed whacker - so it's airing out. However, the ground underneath is bare dirt that has been exposed for 17 years, and it has a noticeable smell when you walk outside near the skirting.

I am completely paralyzed with fear. I don't even want to bring furniture inside because I’m terrified I’m making a huge mistake by not doing an ERMI test first. We do not have time. We do not have the money or sanity to ERMI each home. We have looked at so many rentals probably 15+ at this point.

I keep thinking the underbelly must have absorbed 17 years of toxins, that I will have a massive flare on day one, and that I'll force my excited family to pack up and lose everything again and face another disaster in the first 6 weeks.

I cannot afford an expensive CIRS doctor or thousands in remediation.

Has anyone with active CIRS lived over an open dirt crawl space? If the floor vents/sinks don't smell, does that mean the interior is safe? Will putting 6-mil plastic sheeting down over the dirt and wiping the walls & airing out actually work to keep me stable, and give me room for healing and settling again or is a 17-year bare dirt floor too late to fix?

I am so tired of running and just want my family to have peace.

Please tell me your honest experiences with homes like this.

can we keep a brand new living room set that was in a home we had to leave in just 6 weeks? i have cirs and ended up having the vacate the home in 6 weeks.. the new couch and recliner sat there maybe 8-9 weeks til we got everything out and into storage. we are moving to a new place and obviously cannot get rid of it. it was around $3k or close to it for the new set and we are still paying on it. we cannot afford any kind of professional cleaning.

will it be okay?

i know i post here a lot but i am scared to absolute death. i have cried every day this week, sobbing tears, a ball of nerves & a complete nervous wreck. i really need to heal for my family im not even 30, i have 2 kids, and CIRS has stole everything from me. i cannot afford a cirs dr. it would take 2 months entire pay checks to even see one, let alone run lab tests, and medicine. i’ve left the home that gave me CIRS 1 yr ago June, 17th.. i cannot get out of exposure. we have looked. and moved. living with family now.. i grieve for my life so bad. i miss my home. our routines. the mother i was. my life before CIRS took it all away. i have POTs, MCAS, CFS.. CIRS. i try soo hard every day just to get up and go to work. i cannot bring myself to sleep in a tent. i want to be close to my children. this is not normal. this is unreal to me. please anyone tell me it gets better and tell me i’ll be okay and we will have a home again. i am so depressed from this i cannot hardly go on.

why are the only people who claim they’re better from CIRS are the CIRS practitioners or proficiency partners? rarely do i see someone like myself.

anyone used to drink alcohol often before finding out that they had CIRS? and do you still ever drink any? i swear it made me feel better and i just need a mental break.

anyone else deep into this starting to think a lot of this is woohoo? i clearly know i have cirs and you’re like, alright it’s mold & get out of the house and then you still don’t get better turns out it’s every house and guess what your life is actually over and you’re homeless and you lose your family and everyone around you. oh, but don’t forget the endotoxins, acintos, parasites, co infections. did we mention this will actually be probably $50,000-$100,000 to even treat you maybe if you can even get better but we don’t know it could cost more. you have to be fucking joking. if i had know what i known today id never have left the house i was in. i would have died because this has ruined me and my families lives. the only people who get better are extremely privileged. i had someone tell me their parents gave them $45,000 oh that’s wonderful. my parents hate my guts and i don’t even make that in a years work.

am i literally going to die? is there any even a point to keep going if you can’t get out of exposure over and over again? if you’re low income do you honestly have a fighting chance or no.

how and when did you find a safe home to detox in and heal in?

i’m really just at my breaking point with everything in my life. my relationship has been so rocky and in ways emotionally abusive for me. i’m not going into details but a lot of narcissism, arguing and everything is always my fault. just so much mind f*cking, belittling and i just feel like shit most of the time. lik no one in my life has ever made me feel this way. there’s so much arguing and bs so much at time where i can’t even remember half the time what even happens. i am not happy. i don’t feel heard. i don’t feel seen. i’m the one who has to figure shit out 247. i have CIRS and have been sick for so long and just finding out what it was last june and i lost the rental my kids and i made a home for nearly 3-4 years. i’ve felt so stuck because i genuinely do not know how i will make it financially ( we barely are now ) with my fiance. we r low income and i mean, low. we are living with my family rn and have looked at other places to live and they are all moldy and water damaged. it’s f*cking dumb. i miss my life. i do not want this relationship anymore. i want to be on my own again. i have the mold genes so it’s not likely this is even going to be easy at all. and i cannot even afford all that this takes let alone afford a safe rental that has the amount of mold that is even “ safe “. i feel like my whole life is f*cked and im stuck. there’s so much more than this but it’s been this way even before i got CIRS.

my latest lab ranges have confused me. can anyone help me break this down? can someone tell me if this protocol sounds good?

my first tgfb1 after leaving a second home that made me sick in just 6 weeks and 6 months after leaving my rental home of nearly 4 years was,, now living in my grand parents home since ..

TGFB1 - 4075 on 11/11.
TGFB1- 4097 on 4/14.

MMP9 - 727 on 11/11.
MMP9 - 438 on 1/20.
MMP9 - 468 on 4/14.

MSH - < 8 on 11/11.
MSH - < 8 on 1/20.
MSH - 32 on 4/14.

I do not believe the MSH is accurate on the last draw. I ordered from Moldco. & the last set I ended up with a huge swollen bruise after getting them done so I’m assuming somewhere something went wrong and got them done again, just as a tie breaker to really see where I am. I’m a nervous wreck.

I had flu A Feb 21 & just recently started getting some energy.

My CIRS Proficiency Partner has started me on
2 Zyrtec a day
4 fish oils
2 Pepcid
4 Quercetin
2 Resveratrol
Mag Calm
Fiji Water with electrolytes
& eventually will lead to titration of Mycobind.

this is all i can afford, i can get welchol from Moldco. but I am scared of that, too and wanted to start something fit for someone more sensitive. I’m so scared of feeling worse. I am sure I am still in some type of exposure but will not test my families home because I cannot fix the problems and nether can they.

Does this sound Solid? I also tested positive for MARCoNS.

has anyone actually slept outside and healed and was able to live in a home again??

I have the 13-6 and 7-3 genotypes. My TGF-beta 1 is currently 4,097, spiking even after I "did everything right" and left the home that gave me CIRS. I lost everything, my home, my belongings, only to find that every rental I can afford has a history of water damage.
I’m currently in a "waiting zone." I’m living with my elderly grandparents in a small town where "mold-free" housing simply doesn't exist on a low-income budget. I can’t move again; I have a job to hold, kids in school, and zero financial safety net. I’m being told I "can't heal in exposure," but for me, exposure is my reality. I’m too afraid to start binders because I can't risk an intensification reaction that makes me lose my job. It feels like the Shoemaker Protocol was built for a reality that doesn't include people like me.
Is anyone else here parenting and working while stuck in an imperfect environment? How do you manage the "inhumane" choice between staying sick and becoming homeless? I’m exhausted and looking for anyone who understands the battle of being 13-6/7-3 in a world that isn't built for us.