u/NoBag3124

Hi, potatoes! Real quick for context, the people in this post are me, my friend, and my boyfriend. For anonymity purposes I will be Apple (20f), my friend will be Mango (20f) and my boyfriend will be Tomato (20m)

Anyway, to start I would like to say I do not condone body shaming!!! I do not do it to other others, and I expect others, mostly my friends, Family, and other people I’m extremely close with not to do it to me. I don’t think that is too tough of an ask. For some slightly more specific context, I weigh roughly 175, and Mango, weights about 315-320. About a year ago, I was 20 pounds lighter though. I had a stereotypical “hourglass” figure. I’ve always had larger breasts and a larger behind, but I have a prominent waistline (last year it was about 24 inches, now it’s about 26.)

Last year in September I went for my yearly physical, not too long after my 20th birthday. At that physical I found out I was pregnan. I was not expecting to get pregnant and I was not prepared to be pregnant. I was scared and I knew I had some uterine issues (namely endometriosis) so I was worried from the start. I decided other than my boyfriend, Tomato, I would get some advice from my friend, Mango. Everything was going great with that, except I shouldn’t have told Mango. She started making little comments in front of people that myself and Tomato hadn’t told yet like “Oh, Apple is looking rather bloated lately,” and I’d have to brush it off like nothing, but whatever. Unfortunately that was only the beginning.

Almost 3 months into my pregnancy, I got blood tests to find out my babies gender to do a big reveal to everyone who didn‘t know. About a week after my tests, I woke up in the middle of the night bleeding profusely. I lost my baby girl. Tomato lost his baby girl and he still took care of me (Tomato is a W man, he picked me up and carried me to the shower, washed all the bedding, and washed me while I was just a blubbering mess, even though he was grieving too.) Tomato took me to the ER after I was mostly cleaned up and they confirmed the miscarriage was happening and our baby girl was gone.

Of course, I told Mango about that as well. After my miscarriage the comments got worse. “Oh is that pudge ever going away?” “Dang, you have to keep the stretch marks and the bump, but you don’t even get a baby out of it?” That sort of thing. When I told a few of our other friends what happened they all were very supportive, but then Mango started making the comments in front of them too, and not just in private to me. for the past, almost year I’ve been just putting up with it, but the rest of our friends have stopped talking to and hanging out with Mango, not just because of that, but also because Mango isn’t too big into basic hygiene. She showers maybe once every 2 to 3 months. her hair is always so oily it looks wet, and we can genuinely smell her before she enters a room. It’s kind of sad, really. Anyway, she recently asked me if I knew why none of our other friends talk to her anymore and I almost snapped and told her everything. Now I‘m wondering if maybe I should have because she’s still being awful about it.

All in all, potatoes, would I be the a-hole if I told my friend why nobody talks to or hangs out with her anymore, or should I just leave it be?

*I have edited the post. Mango is the replacement fruit for Melon. Same person, new fruit*