I was adopted as an infant, I want to find my mother
As the title says, I was adopted as an infant. I was given one of the best upbringings possible (my dad was a civil servant) although I had more than my fair share of family drama at home, the kind that is endemic to a upper middle class Indian household, but barring that, on the surface, it was a picture perfect life.
I’m 27 now, I sometimes wonder about my biological parents, my mother especially, makes me wonder what she must have endured that she had to let go of me. Part of me feels guilty about even thinking about my biological parents because my real parents are absolute angels.
I recently got in touch with the orphanage I was adopted from and submitted something called a “root search request” where they’ll be providing me details of my adoption and the circumstances I was found in and so on.
This is the first tangible step I’ve taken towards finding my origins.
As I wait for the files and details to come in, i can’t help but ponder over whether I should go looking for my biological mother?
Will it be right for me to spring up in her life 28 years later?
Will it do her more harm than good?
Am I being selfish?
She let go of me for a reason. Will going back to her scrape old wounds for her?
I’m so conflicted.
I want to know what she looks like, what her story is, I’m in a place in life where I can meaningfully help her if she needs it.
Please help me think through this.
Edit- I have spoken to my parents about this and they’re open to the idea of me trying to meet them