Highkey feel like SP is playing in my face💔
So I have this SP I’ve been manifesting for the past 3 years…it’s a celeb SP and tbf manifestation has been a journey for me so well I think compared to how I was 2 years ago I think I have a better understanding on it rn….ive manifested so many things so I don’t doubt about it being real but this celeb SP💔💔💔 sometimes I feel like I’m about to lose my mind. I feel like that’s the one thing I really want so I keep thinking of the worst case scenarios at times..when people ship him with someone else I think about how they potentially could be together (mind you I feel this way about like 5 different people who he’s shipped with like DAMN I’m willing to accept that he’s with everybody but me) and when his stalkers talk about how he’s dating someone by showing a past photo from months ago (which they deleted after someone said that doesn’t even look like him wtf?) I usually don’t wanna believe them cause ew stalkers and recently there hasn’t been a huge thing about him having a gf within the fandom…but a part of me got so fucking anxious and immediately started believing “yep he got a girl let go you don’t wanna be a homewrecker” and trust sometimes whenever I’ve fucking tried to let go….THATS EXACTLY WHEN HE SHOWS A FUCKING SIGN😭😭😭😭😭 like the signs are smaller but still signs nonetheless or when i was giving up and i downloaded hinge…and as i was scrolling through my gallery for photos of myself..I kinda do this roulette system? Whee I scroll quickly then pause and choose a photo…but everytime i’d pause i’d see a photo of him…I’d go yeah whatever and scroll again and then boom another photo and when I’d scroll angrily again and stop BOOM another fucking photo it’s like his ass is stopping me from downloading hinge and moving on cause mind you I don’t even have many of his photos in my gallery and the ones I do are really separated💔💔💔 I genuinely don’t know what else I can do to calm my anxiety, my what if and negative thoughts plus see movement