Really need some help
Hello Reddit. Honestly really scared even talking about this but figured I should try and get some advice and get some of this weight off my shoulders
I (18M) recently realised that I might be bi and have been wanting to talk to someone about it. I have a close friend that I was going to come out to today over the phone but got really nervous when I went to say anything about it. It’s not like he wouldn’t be supportive of me I mean him and a few of my other friends are apart of the LGBT+ community so it doesn’t really make sense to me why I’m so scared to tell him.
For pretty much my whole life I’ve been certain that I was straight but something that I won’t disclose here made me realise that I might not be entirely opposed to the idea of a relationship with another man. I feel like I still prefer women but it feels wrong somehow to say that I’m 100% straight. And to be completely honest admitting that to myself feels horrible, like I’ve been lying to myself for my whole life. Well that or that I’m lying to myself now.
I do really want to tell someone this to maybe make it make more sense in my own head but a part of me feels like if I do then I might be judged for being so adamant that I was straight this whole time. And then on top of that what if I’m not actually bi and I’m just going crazy or I’m confused or I’m misreading whatever it is that I’m feeling right now.
It probably isn’t making it easier that for like my whole life my family, particularly my sister, have teased and joked that they think I’m gay. And I have denied it so much that admitting to them that they were kind of right is terrifying to me.
So yeah. Any advice would be greatly appreciated but putting this out there at all is honestly making me feel a little better about everything. Thank you