Anyone else relieved when they see multi kid families?
Anyone else relieved when they see multi children families?
I love my child but he is 3, and everyone around me in having the next kid. 2 children families feel complete in pictures too.
However, when I look at families with two kids and more, I feel relieved thinking I would not have to go through this again. Our hands would not be as full in the airports, I would rather take more vacations, buy a smaller house with a nice view than go for bigger house solely due to necessity and practicality.
And honestly, even if I had more money, far more to comfortable afford another child, I would not. I love my child but did not get to enjoy the motherhood experience (horrific abuse from my birth family, that continues to this day, despite going NC)
For a long time I regretted being a parent as I had no bandwidth left after surviving (and still continuing) the childhood I had.
It feels like seeing multi children families is my guilty pleasure where I feel, “okay I have it better than them”
But I also know when I think about this often, perhaps I wanted a second and that is why I constantly compare internally and try to figure out how we are better off with one etc?
I always wanted a daughter and I would perhaps always miss that aspect. But I am so relieved to be one and done.
One surprising thing—
I loved kids when I was in my 20s. I would bring neighbour’s kids to my place and play with them for eternity. Yet now, I profoundly want nothing to do with other’s kids. Yes they are cute but I would rather not do anything with them. I love watching videos of them though.
Rant