Update to finding out my wife had an affair and we have a kid
So I guess long story short I left. It took longer than I thought it would to leave honestly. I was so broken and willing to do anything to save what was left (I know I got what I deserved) I was selfish for wanting to try to make it work but deep down I knew it wasn’t. I guess I just needed a reason to leave and she gave me one when she cheated again (of course why wouldn’t she) I feel like a fool and a stupid person for even thinking that it could work.
We have officially both said that this wasn’t going to work and that I needed to go. I’m not going to go into depth but she cheated like 2 weeks after I posted OP. When I first heard about the affair it broke me completely and I was feeling so overwhelmed by everything I went to a psychiatrist to see if they could help and they did but also offered therapy. I’m now doing both and hopefully I’m going to get better. I lost 45 pounds after D-Day and keep losing. I’m eating but not as much as I used to which I don’t mind the extra weight being taken away. Im feeling better now and not so torn about her second time because I know it needed to end.
P.S thank you for everyone you commented under my OP. I didn’t think so many people would’ve read mine. Kinda just put it on here to vent I guess.