I get so hateful during my periods
I swear to god I get so triggered by the smallest things. I'm so sarcastic to everyone around me. Hell even when I'm scrolling through social media, I get pissed with the way people act and I judge them like oml its not that serious and I don't act like this at all once I'm done with my periods, if anything I like myself for being patient, understanding and unbothered but it's like I'm an entirely different person a few days before my periods and during it, as if depression and excessive self criticism wasn't enough.
I lash out at my siblings for being kids and I realise it during it and even after, that it wasn't their fault and it's me who's being unnecessarily sensitive but I seriously can't help it and I hate it so damn much.
I feel like I become so insufferable, I'd hate being around a person like me and I feel sad that people have to deal with me. I like to think that I try to control lashing out as much as I can but on those rare moments I don't, I feel insanely guilty after. I feel like I got possessed or something.
It's so frustrating, it's almost like I'm living in those cartoons where a person has a devil and an angel on their shoulder 😭 Also, I avoid texting back people as much as possible, I'd make up the most bs excuses to convince myself that it's okay to not text them, i delay it like crazyy cause i feel like texting back would be insanely emotionally draining, altho I don't think pmdd is to blame for it, but maybe it does get worse around it. Again, I'd hate it if I wasn't texted back to, for days, so it's hypocritical of me to do this to other people and yet I do it cause I'm so very controlled by my emotions.
fuck pmdd ughhhh what's the point of having no cramps and short periods when my life becomes so miserable by pmdd 😭😭 ALSO I ALWAYS GET ONE NASTY PIMPLE WITHOUT FAIL EVERY DAMN MONTH DURING MY PERIODS FUCK YOU HORMONES.