u/Ok_Jackfruit9572

Are there any sponsors able to chat?

I am ready to change. I been addicted to porn and sex since I was 14 years old. Now 28 m, I lost a great relationship with amazing women. This week, I spend the night at my then girlfriend house. I leave my iPad at her house. She saw everything. I tried to fix things with her.
During the conversation, she made me called my mom for her to be aware of the situation. I know I might made fun of the phone call. My mom said she will help me and she is was grateful that my addiction was brought up her attention. Today, I finally deleted every sex related content on my iPhone and iPad. I felt dirty. I broke down emotionally. I call my mom for her assistance. She came to get me.
I didn’t realize my addiction until I realized some context from 2017. I was 19 years old. It made me felt dirty and disgusted with myself.
I spend my money on sex. I felt behind on my finance due to my addiction. I just filed for bankruptcy this week. Since there, I scheduled a therapy session. I will attend my first sa meeting this upcoming Friday.

I don’t know where to start, I blow an solid relationship with an incredible woman. I am 28 m who accepts that I have a sex addiction. Wednesday, I spend the night at my then girlfriend house. I leave my iPad over there, I realize I leave it there when I got to work. She went through my iMessage and photos. She saw everything. On Thursday, I tired to fix things but, it didn’t work. I understand why she feels damaged. I did not deny anything. During the conversation, she made me call my mom. She told everything to my mom. I know I might be get made fun of for it but, I tired to fix things with her. My mom said my son needs help. I am sorry for everything that he did and I was not unaware of it.

Since Thursday, I scheduled an appointment with therapist for Wednesday. I will attend my first sa meeting with Friday. Today, it finally hit me the hardest because, I deleted every single x rated post and videos from my phone and iPad. I started this addiction since I was 14 years old. I started buying content since 2017, when I was 19 years. I felt dirty and, I call my mom for comfort. She came to pick me up. I been at her house since there.
I spend my money on sex, I felt behind so bad that I just filed for bankruptcy. I am ashamed of my personal finances. I lost a great relationship, I am constantly cheating without noticing the consequences. When I saw her face and she was devastated. I finally admitted I had a problem.
I have a solid career, decent income and great support around me. One of my friends reach out to me once he notices my location went down. He didn’t even hesitate to call. How do you guys in recovery notice it was a problem? How do you guys in recovery changes since there? I am ready to change and will try to gain her back.