u/Ok_Succotash_3663

As someone who grew up in a typical Indian middle class household, recycling, reusing, and refurbishing has become second nature to me now.

From having to share my sister's old clothes, to turning my old rags into the kitchen mops, from using paper delivery bags as cupboard liners to redesigning my old long tops as summer crop tops, from stocking plastic covers for later use to reframing content for different platforms, I have done it all.

There is still a lot that can be done.

Share things you have been recycling, reusing, refurbishing and maybe I can grow my list a little longer.

Our Prime Minister gave a speech on Sunday and urged Indians to adhere to certain things as a part of 'National Responsibility' to get through the current economic crisis like situation.

Here are some of the things he mentioned

- Work From Home for the maximum possible number of days.

- Avoid using excessive private commutes. Try carpooling or public transport instead.

- Avoid buying gold

- Avoid International travel.

The nation is now divided into groups that are accusing him of being a hypocrite for mentioning these points and going to watch an Air Show, criticising him for not asking offices to allow WFH or not providing us with more public transport options, ignoring his instructions for their own choices and a very few actually wanting to act on those instructions.

As an Indian citizen, what's your take on this? Does acting on any of the instructions make you feel like a responsible citizen?

I have been working around an idea for a while now which is closely associated with fellow women like me. And I am at a spot where I feel stuck, confused and a little hazy.

During the last couple of years I have had conversations with some amazing women who have had many accomplishments, donned many hats and yet feel unseen, unheard, and at times lacking. Although most of them were either on a career break, transitioning through careers, or making a career comeback there were a few who had a full time career.

If you relate to what I just mentioned or know someone in a similar situation then I am sure you can help me with the idea I am working on.

All I am asking for is 5 minutes of your precious time every Saturday this month to answer a few simple questions about your career.

If you are curious feel free to comment or send me a DM. And I will make sure to satisfy your curious pangs.

If you have done answering that question with a Yes / No / Maybe, then pat yourself on your back because no one else will do it.

Yesterday an incident happened to me and I realised something I had been ignoring for a while.

My Mami (Mama's wife) was in my city and came down to visit Amma because she wanted to see how Amma was recovering after being hospitalised in Feb this year.

My Mama was there too but he chose to stay back at my Maasi's place because of the heart and he didn't want to get sick as they were to go back today.

My Mama is 20 years younger to Amma because they are cousins. And my Mami is probably 2 - 3 years older to me. So, we prefer being casual while having conversations.

After the normal pleasantries my Maami said she was craving something tangy. As I was asking her what she would want to have, she picked up her phone, opened the Swiggy app and started searching for the dish. Then she asked Amma what she wanted to eat. Amma declined her offer politely saying she shouldn't be having outside food. After a little unsuccessful cajoling, she turned to me and asked me if she should order my favourite dish along with what she was ordering for herself. I thought for a while and said NO. I have her a reason too. I told her that it's been almost a year since I had outside food (which is true). The first six months because my parents were visiting my sister in the US and I decided to homecook all my meals, and ever since they were back in Feb, got busy taking care of Amma, so I guess that homecooking phase just continued.

Then my Mami said that she can't order it at my Maasi's place because my Mama is not eating outside food either, as suggested by his doctor. So she feels guilty about ordering food because of how bad my Mama would feel for not being able to share it. She almost dropped the idea of ordering take out, when I blurted something instantly without much thought.

"Seriously. You are feeling guilty about how someone else would feel about your choices? Are you for real? He cannot eat because his doctor restricted him to do so."

She did go ahead and order for herself and left happily after eating it.

But then something snapped within me and I started thinking.

Amma had been doing it for long - feeling guilty of doing something with which we could feel bad. And it never seemed so wrong back then. So, why did I react so strongly when Mami said something similar.

Is it because I have grown up (that would be a nightmare), or the fact that I have been doing the same involuntarily ever since Amma got sick? I do prefer home cooked food now more than before but I do hesitate at times when I want to do things that might make Amma feel bad. It is not just about ordering food but about going out to meet friends, attending social events, focusing on my career which would mean spending less time with Amma.

Am I overthinking, spiralling or just attending the devil's workshop?

Does it happen to you too?

Imagine a parallel universe where being a single woman is just a relationship status on your social media profile and nothing more.

What do you see yourself doing?

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