u/Ok_Weather_4043

I don't want to confuse myself over and over again on the same cycle. My unofficial fiance/bf broke up with me on the day I attempted suicide. I treated him badly name calling him over and over again everytimewe play competitive games. It's going on for a while and he decided not to come with me when I was barely clinging to life. He loves me as much but I didn't treat him that well anymore. When we're both at our lowest, he doesn't want me anymore. So, I need help. I need someone who knows more about this stuffs that I'm going through. I know I have to deal with this alone. But any words would do.