Recovery advice for an addict?
I’ve been addicted to ket for 5ish years (23f). It started off only socially at the weekend, then crept into weekdays, then I discovered how much I liked doing it alone. From there it became all day, every day. The amount I picked up would increase, at the beginning it was only a gram maybe two at a time, then I realised buying in bulk is cheaper. Now, it takes me less than a week to get through an ounce.
None of my family knew, my friends just thought I liked it on a night out, even my ex boyfriend, that I practically lived with took 9 months to figure it out. The only people that knew were my uni housemates. However that all changed 2 weeks ago, I got caught by my brother and he told my whole family. So now I can’t use anymore. I was upset and angry at first, but honestly now I think it’s one of the best things that has happened to me. I tried to stop on my own multiple times, but I would always be drawn back. My family have been really supportive and they want to get me help, I’m looking into NA, therapy and other options, but I think having it out in the open has helped the most. It was this big secret that I couldn’t talk to anyone about, I shut people out and isolated my self which made it feel impossible to stop.
I also didn’t see anything wrong with me using I was very high functioning, it didn’t get in the way of my uni work/ job, I have been lucky and had no health problems, and no problems with my bladder. I would occasionally black out, which was fine when I was on my own, bad when I was with people. I’m not sure if it’s related but I have also recently lost about 10kgs, I’m 5’9 and just under 60kgs, which is still healthy but people have noticed and said I look frail.
I’ve now haven’t used for 2 weeks, and I really want to keep it this way. I have been trying to speak more openly to my family and to distract myself I joined a triathlon club (I have been talking about doing this for a long time). I went to some NA meetings but I don’t think they are for me, I’m also starting therapy soon. I’m still worried that this is a phase and I’ll do what I always do and start using again.
Does anyone have any more advice on staying clean and what do to about cravings?
I am also interested if any serious health problems come later, even if I never used again?