How do extroverts keep a social life without drinking?
Hey everyone... I'm really struggling with figuring out how to cut back on drinking. I feel like it's something that's completely within my control, except in social situations.
I don't feel like I'm traditionally addicted to alcohol as a substance. I don't have cravings or urges. I never drink alone, and it's easy for me to choose not to drink when I'm home by myself. The problem is that there doesn't seem to be any middle ground. I can't seem to go out, see friends, meet people, and not drink a lot. So my solution has become just staying home... but that's a problem too because I'm very extroverted. I get energy from being around people, I love going out, meeting new people, and having a social life. I'm not using alcohol because I'm shy or anxious to be around people. So it doesn't make sense to me why I rely on alcohol so much once I'm in those environments. I should also mention that I'm not being pressured or guilted by other people... it's pressure I'm putting on myself to show up this way.
Somehow my brain has turned it into an "either/or" situation: either I stay home and don't drink, or I go out and end up drinking a lot. How do I get to a place where I can have both?
Has anyone else dealt with this? Are there any strategies that actually helped?
I'm just so tired of this cycle: working hard all week, spending the weekend hungover, and then starting all over again on Monday. I want to be able to go out, see my friends, go to parties, and have a social life... but I also want to stop drinking, or at least reduce it significantly. Right now, it feels like the only way I can accomplish that is by completely isolating myself, and I don't think that's the answer either.
I'm not necessarily trying to never drink again... I just want to get to a place where drinking feels like a choice instead of something that automatically happens whenever I'm out.
Thanks for reading and any advice you might have!