No major life changes
hi sorry in advance if nothing makes sense. i’m spiraling.
i (28f) have been married to my husband (29m) for a year now. dating since 2021. living together since 2022. we eloped last year 2025, had a beautiful ceramony, fantastic honeymoon, came home and haven’t had sex since. basically a year of resentment and anxiety. divorce is currently not an option for me, financially or otherwise.
about two weeks ago i was bored and very horny. i made a profile on online chat. last week i got a message from someone else married and struggling (42m) and we hit it off. we’ve talked the last week almost nonstop, already had phone calls and voice messages and we had a video call two days ago. it has been the most invigorating convo i’ve had in years. he’s hilarious and sweet and kind and very sexy. it got kinda intense, we definitely make a lot of jokes but his ground rule is no major life changes. we also live on opposite sides of the country from each other.
this leads to my questions/problem, i’ve never done this “affair” thing before. i really really like this man. this weekend we hardly spoke because i was visiting my in laws. i’m trying to not be desperate and text/call him all hours of the day but i am suffering not talking to him. i couldn’t sleep last night and now im just up tonight a mess waiting for his response. he’s literally a dream husband imo but it seems like he and his wife have some issues that have been building up for a while. my question to you all who have had affairs before - is this actually genuine or am i infatuated with someone who pays attention to me? is this normal?
any advice would be phenomena!! thank u all in advance😭😭