u/Optimal_Planto

This happened about a year ago, but it left me feeling very uneasy so I've decided to share it now

I'll preface this by saying I've had many nightmares, lucid dreams, I've reached deep meditative states and I've taken substances before - this does not compare to any of those experiences.

It happened while I was asleep, but it did not feel like a dream.

I was lucid, but I wasn't me, I wasn't anyone. I couldn't remember anything of this world, no semblance of reality or anything beyond what this space I existed in was. Which was weird, given how it felt like my mind was awake.

It was dark, but it was nothing. I wasn't scared, it felt peaceful like a warm hug and I was just sinking deeper down into it.

I had this pulling sensation towards the bottom and a feeling that it would be okay if I just let go. I felt there was another presence, who was asking if I was sure I wanted to. I realised at the last second I wasn't, and I thought to myself that I'm not ready to leave yet. Even though I couldn't remember who I was, where I was leaving, or literally anything.

Then I woke up, wide awake and pretty terrified wondering what the fuck just happened.

I genuinely felt like I would've died had I given in to the sensation. I think perhaps I had sleep apnea, or it's related to my ongoing cardiac issues (nothing serious, supposedly).

So yeah, I think I almost died in my sleep. Has anyone experienced anything similar?

Intentionally*

I'm barely 3 weeks out of a 3 year relationship, already I have too many people trying to get my attention. I'm sick of rejecting people I just want to be left alone, or not looked at in that way.

I feel like the crows have come to feast. I keep getting messages from random people I barely know who have heard about the breakup, others are people who I thought were friends.

Some of them are charming, handsome and kind but they're demanding too much of my attention way too soon. I've been avoiding going out as I know people are gossiping about me being single (because of the random messages, it's a small city) and I don't want to be perceived in that way.

I feel rude ignoring their messages as I respect and enjoy talking to some of them but I also feel very overwhelmed.

I find being in a relationship easy as men generally respect that as a reason to not try and advance.

I was in a 5 year relationship 8 months before my 3 year relationship so I haven't really spent much time single. Even in between I was dating a lot and had casual relationships.

I want to be intentionally single, but it seems so difficult with men throwing themselves at me.