u/Organic-Parking3280

We’re planning to scatter some of my husband’s ashes soon and I’m trying to figure out logistics. We’ll be traveling abroad to do this. I’ve already sorted out all the legal and logistical aspects of traveling with cremains, but I haven’t figured out what to put them in.

I’ll be keeping some of the ashes and already have them in an urn at home. To be frank, I don’t really want to spend a few hundred dollars on an additional urn just to take it somewhere and empty it out. It also doesn’t seem feasible to bring the current urn and somehow only scatter part of what’s in there and then pack it and take it home again. Should I buy an inexpensive urn and transfer some ashes just for the scattering? Is there another option I’m not thinking of?

I’m planning to go back to work this coming Monday. My husband died unexpectedly after a short illness in June. We are young-ish (late 30’s/early 40’s) and have a young son, so this is uncharted territory for most people we know. Not only am I dreading going back to work for the associated stress but also for the need to perform and put on a professional face.

How do people navigate being professional but also not completely fake when going back to work after something like this? I can’t respond to “how are you doing?” with “terrible - I feel sick to my stomach and I cry constantly”. But I feel equally mad and unfair having to pretend things are ok with a “hanging in there. Thanks for asking.” I know there’s no “right” answer but any personal experience from others would be good to hear especially those who work in more corporate environments.

My husband died a week and a half ago. I still feel very numb. He died relatively suddenly after a sudden illness and a seven week hospital stay. He’d been a healthy 42 year old before that though so it was unexpected and we didn’t have estate planning as organized as we should have.

We had a combination of shared and separate bank accounts. We had access to each others accounts because we shared passwords, but I’m not actually named on his individual accounts. It would really help me right now to move some money from his individual account to a joint account to cover household finances and a memorial while I’m off work but I’m worried about repercussions with the bank from doing this once I tell them he’s passed away ie them querying why money was moving from the account after the date of death.

Has anyone been in a similar situation or know whether this is problematic?