Constant breaking up?
Im in a relationship with a woman with diagnosed BPD. And I'm starting to have big issues with the constant discussions on breaking up.
This has been for so long, that she every once in a while brings up that she wants to break up and she has been thinking about it for a long time.
It has come to the point, where I kind of have gotten used to it.
We have been together for 8 years now. The relationship has been quite a rollercoaster.
There has been situations where we have been a part for few days, and talking about breaking up.
And she does everything to make it very real, like starting to suggest apartments and packing some of my clothes etc... But it always ends up in the point where I say ok, this is it and I'm starting to take active steps towards it. At this point she loses it and it goes to being about how easily I give up and don't take accountability on my actions.
Today I found a writing she has written. In that writing she states that her feelings towards me are all gone and probably will never return.
She also states, that she will be in this relationship only due to practical reasons, saves up money and waits until the kids are older and the oldest will move away and she is financially in better situation.
Note; the kids are hers, we don't have kids together.
I have a child also, but he doesn't live with us.
That letter hit quite hard and it is really hard to take it only as a vent, but more of an real plan.
Lately I have been quite surprised how much better things have been, no big fights or nothing, we have been just living together sharing our lives together, but that has been after she wrote that.
I have no idea what to do. I'm feeling so used, as I am only here as providing better financial future for her, so she can leave this relationship