u/PinkHarlow

Depression is slowly eating me away, and it feels like everything I do is just delaying the inevitable.

I have always felt suicidal, never did anything with the thoughts but I always had them, ever since I was a kid. I feel like one day, when I'll decide to do something to myself I won't have a suicide attempt, but become a statistic.

Recently, I've found a boyfriend, which I feel like he actually cares for me... A person who doesn't have anything to offer, all I can do really is just lend a ear, because I'm not that great at anything else in life.

I don't excell in anything, I've recently "finished" hischschool, after failing one year, and recently, failing my finals. After all these years, I don't really even have anything to show for it, I didn't pick up my diploma yet, didn't even felt like attending the whole ceremony. What for? I don't know what to do now with my life. Feels like I've just wasted around five years of my mental health and life.

I just feel like everything in life is pretty pointless, there are moments of happines here and there, but on the inside I just feel... Empty.

Some of the cookies my boyfriend baked for me a few days ago, when I was visiting him. If there is a reason to live it might genuinely be these fucking cookies, because they were absolutely delicious. I'm struggling with an ed, and it's a first time in a while, when I ate cookies.