18 months no contact - fucking empowered.
Cut off my narcissistic mother 18 months ago after my final straw.
Realised how deep routed my people pleasing and lack of self worth was due to my relationship with her.
Cutting her off was like rewiring my subconscious to “nobody will ever exploit you like this again, you are whole, you are loved, and I’ve got you”
Since then, my ability to stay firm in boundaries and not fold to emotional manipulation has continuously improved. And it’s a natural progression. I’m not over expending energy improving in that regards.
These improvements showed up in my romantic relationship, friendships, other family members, and career.
All of which have improved since.
I don’t regulate my partners emotions and fail to communicate my needs. We have deeper intimacy and trust.
I don’t accept people into my life who don’t make me feel seen and appreciated. I now found the most aligned friendship group I’ve ever had.
I don’t accept scenarios at work that are unfulfilling and that don’t fairly recognise my value. My income has since doubled and I have received opportunities way earlier in my career than expected.
For me, all this stems back to what was born internally the moment I decided to operate from “I love you and always will but respectfully fuck you for not giving me the love I deserved, I’ll provide it for myself” and cutting her off.
I didn’t just cut her off. I fucking rewired the foundations of my self esteem.
Crazy.
I really hope my story can empower some of you guys to trust your intuition and put yourself first.
They never did. But you can.
I extend love to all of you reading this and hope you can feel as empowered as I do 18 months later.
My experience is just my experience and by no means I’m I telling you what to do. I just hope that this insight is helpful, as I know it would have been for a previous version of myself.