This is just me complaining...I had normal same time every month very light periods for over 5 years then in October-December 2025 they got EXTREMELY heavy out of nowhere then January rolls around and I mean what the hell is this
I had normal same time every month very light periods for over 5 years then in October-December 2025 they got EXTREMELY heavy out of nowhere then January rolls around and I mean what the hell is this
I'm 18 and I'm supposed to start community college in late August. I'm going into STEM, specifically engineering, but I'm having a bit of a crisis over whether this is actually what I want.
For some background, I'm the youngest of eight siblings. There's a 12-year age gap between me and the next youngest. My siblings had a pretty rough time growing up. Only one graduated high school on time, and two others eventually got their GEDs years later. Because of that, I've always felt like I'm the one who's expected to "make it." Everyone in my family talks about me going to college, getting a good career, and doing all the things my siblings didn't.
I actually considered taking a gap year because I had no clue what I wanted to do, but I was worried that if I took one, I'd never end up going. So I enrolled in community college and picked engineering.
The problem is...I don't think I actually want to be an engineer.
I'm interested in science, but I'm not great at math, and I mostly chose engineering because people say it pays well. If I'm being honest with myself, that's the main reason I picked it. I don't hate it, but I don't feel excited about it either.
The bigger problem is that I don't know what I do want. There are a lot of careers that seem interesting. There are also things I'd enjoy that don't even require a four-year degree. I can barely decide what I want to eat tomorrow, so expecting myself to decide what I want to do for the next 40 years feels impossible.
Lately I've even been questioning whether I should go to college at all. Part of me also wishes I'd chosen a university instead of community college because I feel like I'm going to miss out on the whole college experience, even though community college made more financial sense.
To make things harder, my grandpa was an engineer. He's been talking about helping me out with things like a computer, money, maybe even a car. I know he wants the best for me, and I feel guilty because I'm not sure engineering is what I want anymore.
I haven't told my family any of this because I know it'll be a huge deal. They've put so many expectations on me that I feel trapped between doing what everyone else wants and trying to figure out what I actually want.
Has anyone else been in this position? Did you start college without knowing what you wanted? Did changing majors or taking time off end up being the right choice? I just feel completely lost and don't know if I'm overthinking everything or if these feelings are trying to tell me something.