Manifested my SP back after months of no contact, but now I’m struggling with hot and cold/extremely hurtful behaviour
I manifested my SP back after about 6 months of no contact. During that time we weren’t talking, aside from occasionally liking each other’s Instagram posts. Eventually they came back into my life, and for the past several months we’ve been seeing each other again, but still not in an official relationship.
When we are together in person, everything feels amazing. They are caring, affectionate, attentive, curious about my life, and we always have a really good time. The connection feels genuine, the intimacy is great, and when we’re actually together, it feels like there is something really real between us.
But when we’re not together, the dynamic is extremely painful. They can be very hot and cold, cancel plans, not reschedule, and then leave me in silence for long stretches of time. Sometimes it feels like I get dropped back into the void after we have a really good time together. It’s been really hurtful and confusing, especially because earlier in our reconnection they were much more considerate and consistent. This current behaviour feels so different from how things were at the beginning. I'm currently in so much pain right now that I don't even feel like I have the strength to keep my thoughts in order or manifest anything and I might be making it worse.
They are going through some personal stuff in their life right now that has nothing to do with me, and I think that is also affecting how they are able to show up right now, but that doesn't make it any less painful.
I’m really struggling right now because the silence and lack of follow-through sends me into looping thoughts like: why don’t they want to see me? Why don’t they care that this is hurting me? Why are they acting this way now when they didn’t act like this earlier in the reconnection? Why is it so warm and connected in person, but so painful and absent when we’re apart? Why don't they miss me too? Why are they okay with going so long without seeing me or speaking to me? Why is there no sense of urgency to see me? We've literally only seen each other once this month since they coldly cancelled plans on me last week at the last minute with no attempt to reschedule.
I know people will probably say to focus on self-concept, not react to the 3D, persist in the desired version, etc., and I understand that. But I’m honestly feeling really heartbroken and emotionally exhausted right now, and the pain is feeling like it's just overtaking everything in me right now. I think I just need comfort and insight from other people who have experienced something similar.
Has anyone else manifested someone back and then had to deal with hot/cold behaviour after the reconnection? How did you handle the pain and the looping thoughts without spiralling or giving up on the version you actually wanted?