Need some advice about my future in Italy (if you’re in the south, this is for you)
Hi! I’m an American (26F) studying in Milan, doing my triennale in psychology. I’ve been in Italy for almost 4 years now, I have a B2 in Italian, have an Italian boyfriend, and I’m enjoying myself here.
I’ve been in Milan for almost 3 years, but to be real, it’s not my place — as is the case for a lot of people. It’s just too much of a city for me, but now I’m happy.
I’m a bit unsure which path I want to take in psychology, but I’ve been working with kids for years and I know I work very well with them — I genuinely love kids. I was checking the stats of psychologists in Italy, and the majority of them are in Lombardy, but there’s a need for child psychologists in the south. I’ve been thinking for quite a while about doing my master’s in Italian in the south for “psicologia dello sviluppo” (child development, basically) and working to become a child psychologist in the south (maybe a school psychologist, but we shall see).
But here are my doubts:
I have a southern Italian boyfriend (Campania), and he’s told me a pretty sad story about meeting a child psychologist in the south who lied to all the clients’ parents and told them their children had problems just to make more money. What’s wild to me is that this psychologist admitted this to my boyfriend 💀
His mom is a teacher at a primary school, and she’s told me all the shitty things the psychologists do there (basically the same as the other psychologist I mentioned before).
Here’s my biggest doubt: the fucking phones. Oh my god. The amount of children in the south who look under the age of 5 and have their faces in a phone for MINUTES just makes me BURN inside. We’ll be out at 11 at night, kids with their parents’ phones at the table… minchia raga. This isn’t just a few; this is genuinely everywhere. I see this in Campania and also Puglia (I’m here right now). So I know these kids are a bit screwed here compared to kids in the north (I work/worked for many northern Italian families, and they’re very strict about screen time and also eating habits — meno male).
My fear about the future is that in the south, I’ll probably run into so many limitations when it comes to caring for children: parents not caring and not being more strict because it genuinely seems like they don’t care, other psychologists being unprofessional and basically scammers, and the biggest one — taking on the burden of the problems of so many kids but genuinely not being able to help them because the culture is just not up to date on things (it seems to me).
Here’s a positive:
Kids know how to talk. I’ve met so many cute kids who crack jokes (even if I don’t understand because they speak dialect), but they have a confidence that I’ve never seen before in kids in Italy. This is something I really love because, with how social southerners are, kids really can talk to just about everyone. Obviously, not all, but a lot of kids are very chatty down here.
I know there could be some generalizations, and it’s probably not as black and white as I’m making it seem, but from my observations and the stories I’ve been told… maybe the south isn’t for me in terms of my future in psychology.
I come to Campania frequently and stay for weeks each time I come, so I’m very familiar with the culture and norms. I hope I don’t offend anyone, but after many years of visits, befriending southern Italians, and understanding the difficulties they face culturally and socially, I understand the limits but also the beauty of the culture. I do love it down here! Southerners are such spontaneous and lively-spirited folks! With their problems, of course, but I really love the south so much.
It would be wonderful to hear your thoughts!