How much is too much?
I’m a 49F and I’ve always had a high libido. As long as I can remember I’ve always loved sex. When dating I always warned the guys I was with that one of my biggest flaws is that I love sex..I treat sex like breathing it’s a non-negotiable in a relationship. They all say it’s cool until they realize they can’t keep up. I can have it (orgasms and sex) multiple times per day and prefer to have it everyday. I was in a marriage for 23 years and would actually get mad at my husband for barely keeping up with 4x a week. We opened our marriage and I was with him and my boyfriend and only then was I satisfied sexually. We would have threesomes every weekend for 10 months. Until my husband started realizing he couldn’t keep up. It was one of the reasons why ended up separating.
My boyfriend on the other hand, has a super high sex drive like me and we are very sexually compatible we have sex at least 2-3 times a day and are having sex daily. We also go to sex clubs…I thought this type of libido was normal for all women…but quickly realized after posting on a different subreddit about the frequency I’m having sex that in fact it isn’t the case. They either didn’t believe me or they said I have a problem. I feel like a freak.
Tbh…especially now that I’m older I feel even being perimenopausal my drive has gotten out of control. I can have sex multiple times per day and still masturbate at night when my BF is asleep. I feel like I need help. I realize it does affect my life, like I will call in sick because I want more sex..and I get very bitchy when I don’t get it..in terms of timing. I use sex to deal with stress and while at the same time I’ll use it for pleasure. I feel so alone in this feeling. It’s starting to become a problem because a kink of mine is to do risky sex (like risky potentially getting caught in public sex) during an argument over this, my BF had mentioned opening up our relationship so I can find someone who can satisfy me…I have to admit it hurt to hear him say that..it made me realize I truly have a sex addiction. I don’t know what to do..I love him so much and only want to be with him. I love sex but I don’t want this to ruin my relationship.