u/Realistic-Ice-9714

Recently I moved to a different city really far from home for my first job, even going back home takes a really long time. Here I don't speak their language and most of the time I don't understand what people are saying. I feel like if I could speak it I could have blended in so easily but I can't, they mostly talk to me when something is important about work and other than that I just feel like I don't exist. It's really isolating.

I'm also having a really really hard time at work, the work is exhausting and some days I literally feel like throwing up. Working hours are long too, I leave in the morning and after I come back, eat, bath, wash my clothes and everything it's easily 11 at night and then the same thing again the next day. I make sure I call home everyday but I can't even tell them what I'm actually going through because I know it will make them sad and worried and they can't do anything from so far away. So I just don't tell them.

And I don't really have anyone else to talk to either. Even if I think about telling someone my problems I feel like they will start seeing me as weak and then they'll always look at me that way so I just keep most things to myself.

The thing is I could have gotten a job near my home but I know it wouldn't be that useful for me in the longer run and for my career, that's why I chose to come here. But now I keep having these thoughts like is it really worth it? My parents are getting old and everyone I love is at home, literally everything I like is there and I'm here so far away from all of it.

I keep thinking what if in the future I look back and regret taking this decision. I'm choosing my career thinking about the future but what if time just goes and I'm too late? What if I don't get enough time with the people I love? I know being here might be better for my career in the long run but I don't know if one day I'll look back and wish I had chosen the time with my parents and the people I love instead. I really don't know if what I'm doing is worth it or if I'm just having these thoughts because everything is so difficult right now.

For people who moved far from family for their career, was it worth it? Did things get better, or do you regret the time you missed with them?