Scruffy 08/2011 - 07/04/2026
My boi died today. I was giving him his medicine, and I thought he choked and suffocated, but now after several hours have passed, I think he might have had a heart attack. I had a cat, Buddy, years ago that suffocated in my arms. Scruffy’s body didn’t do the same things Buddy’s did when he 100% suffocated. I believe the stress of being wrapped up in a blanket and forced medicine might have been too much and took its toll on his little heart. I got done giving him medicine and took him out of the blanket and carried him to my room. The whole way I held him like a baby and had my ear on his head to listen to him breathe. He was breathing, but they sounded and felt weak. I got him to the bed and that’s when he was motionless. I tried CPR, and stopped after 10mins. Had dad trying to find a vet that was open, called emergency vet “oh we can’t help assist you with CPR.” Thanks lady 🙄
I wanted to post some pictures of Scruffy to share with everybody. From one of my first pictures of him, to his last one alive. He was such a sweet boi. He was very territorial and sometimes aggressive with people he did not know, but with me and the rest of his family, he was the sweetest boi.
I wrote him a letter. I wanted to post here. I wrote it as if I’m talking to him. I wrote it on paper and took pictures of it before a buried him with it. I used the pictures to copy the words to paste here. I don’t really know why I want to share something so personal, but I guess it’s cause there were similar things I wanted to say here and I figured just copying and pasting would be faster than trying to reword everything I wrote for him.
Letter:
Scruffy,
I loved you so much. I was so happy to become Your dad/mom and take care of you after your mom disappeared and bottle fed you and your brothers and sister.
You were one of my greatest joys and accomplishments that wandered into my life, when I saved you and your siblings all those years ago from drowning in the clogged pipe under our driveway where your mom decided to birth you guys. Today, I feel like your greatest failure. I tried so hard to keep you alive and healthy, to make you better. I am so sorry I failed you. I am going to miss you so much. I will miss your squeaky purr, how you'd smack the trash out of the air when I tossed it, how you'd smuggle your head into my arm and feeling your wet nose on my skin. I remember when you were a kitten I’d be laying on the floor with you guys and you’d crawl up on my chest and look at me and lay down. I remember taking you to GameStop with me and we ate pizza together on my shoulder. You were my little buddy. I even got a shirt that reminded me so much of you and me. I still have it.
I tried my very best to save you. CPR didn’t work. I felt your big paws move, trying to come back, but it wasn’t enough. I loved you so much, I hope you know that. I hope you still love me too, even though I failed you in the worst way possible. I'm so sorry, Scruffy.
My favorite memory is when you gave those vets hell. I
asked them if they needed my help getting you in your carrier. "No.” They Said. Boy were they wrong. I could hear you for 5mins just screaming at them, raising hell, as I waited patiently at the desk, while everyone in the waiting room was looking at the door at all the commotion you were causing. A person came into the office with his pet and heard you and said to me “that’s one angry cat.” I say “yeah, that’s mine” with a smile on my face.
The receptionist came and got me for help. When I got through the door and into that room that was the funiest shit I'd ever seen. Two vets with one mitten each, one with a broom trying to fend you off and sweep you into your carrier, one with a blanket trying to trap you, and one of them had blood on his arm. 5 vets couldn't handle your 32lb raging ass. I say “Scruffy! What are you doing boi?!” You turned your head to me immediately when you heard me say your name. I walk over, talking to you “what are you doing to these poor people boy??”, I take the blanket from the one, wrapped you up no problem and carried you to your carrier. All they could say was "Wow.” Like they were impressed or hadn’t seen anything like it. That's when I knew without any doubt that you loved and trusted me whole heartedly. This is one of my absolute favorite memories of you, and I tell this story with pride. Who else could have a bond so strong with a cat like this? How fortunate I am for your love.
I love you Scruffy boi, I will miss you. You were one of my greatest joys, greatest accomplishments, greatest loves, and I ended up being your greatest failure. Please forgive me.
Your Dad
Wayne
I held you in my arms as I bottle fed you your milk, I held you in my arms as you took your last breaths.